I Yoga Party - Do You?

Don't Mess with My World

2011-12-16T11:38:00.003-06:00

I was running a few errands the other day and was leaving a parking lot. As I turned onto the main street, I saw a drink cup fly out of the window of the car in front of me. Being the "save the world and recycle" kind of girl that I am, I was appalled and considered getting out of my car to pick up the cup and give it back to the driver. I figured I would just be left standing in the road with a paper cup as the offending driver drove off ahead of me. So, I gave up on that thought.

It turned out that we were both stopped at the next light side by side, with her to my right. My convertible top and windows were down and her window was open. So tempting, so so tempting. I just had to say something (being the "say what's on your mind" kind of girl that I am!) and so I did. "Please don't throw trash out your window" I said in a polite tone. She yelled back "Did you see me throw trash out my window?". "Yes, I did.", I replied. And she continued yelling all sorts of things back at me - including "mind your own business!". "It is my business. You are messing up my world", I replied. I felt sorry for the three kids in the car and only hoped they would see that throwing the trash out the window was wrong, not that their mom going ballistic was right. Maybe the driver would stop and think next time before she threw something out her window. I can only hope. It ended peacefully and I am still alive. She rolled her window up and I considered making a u-turn and going back to pick up the cup.

I think it is important to speak up when things are not right. It is not always the easy thing to do but sometimes it is the only way to get things to change for the better. Let people know things are not ok.

I occasionally give out cards to my yoga students. There are three questions on the card -

1. What am I doing that you like and want me to keep doing?
2. What am I doing that you don't like and want me to stop doing?
3. What am I not doing that you would like me to start doing?

They said there wasn't anything they wanted me to stop doing. I guess things are all right - at least in my yoga world.

Confirm Receipt

2011-12-16T00:27:00.005-06:00

I noticed on my phone that I missed a call from one of my personal training clients but there wasn't a "message waiting" symbol so I let it go. Sometimes people accidentally dial your number and hang up quickly before you answer. The next morning I went to pick him up for our workout session and he wasn't ready. "Didn't you get my voice message?", he asked. "No, I didn't", I replied. I checked my phone and there were no messages. I didn't doubt he called and left a message. Cell phone technology leaves much to be desired. I told him it wasn't a big deal but to think about the implications in other business situations. He is a young man, new to the business world. I suggested that he confirm receipt of messages when dealing with business associates. As he could see, you can't rely on voice messages and text messages to always go through or be read by the other person. Their time table for checking messages may be very different than yours. He agreed to the importance of confirmation.

A few years back I was carpooling to a yoga event with a girlfriend. We were going to ride together in my convertible. The weather was perfect for a "hair blowing in the breeze, sun on your face" kind of day. A friend of hers decided to join us for the class. My car only has room for two ("Useless" - is how one friend's husband has always described it. I say - room enough for my friend and our two beach chairs. Who needs anything else!). I needed a top down day and left her a voice mail message on her work phone that I would ride on my own and meet them there. After a while I didn't hear back so I called again but couldn't leave a message because her voice mail box was full. I called and left a message on her cell phone and her house phone and e-mailed her, but never got a confirmation that my message was received. I went to the rendezvous spot to wait, thinking she hadn't received my message. She happened to drive by on her way to the class and see me in the parking lot waiting. She pulled in and asked why I was there. "I thought you were going on your own!". "I never got a confirmation that you received my message!", I replied. A simple e-mail, text or quick call back would have avoided a lot of confusion.

In yoga, I ask permission to adjust a student's pose. And they give an indication it is ok or let me know of an injury or issue to watch out for as I help them get deeper in the pose. I always encourage them to listen to their body as they move into poses and pull back if it doesn't feel right. Your body is trying to return your call and let you know the message was received. Watch for those cues.

Fun Size

2011-10-27T17:14:00.002-05:00

Catalogs arrive at the house weekly - even more near the holidays. I like to look through the ones with entertaining t-shirts and games and puzzles. My most recent favorite was a t-shirt that read "I'm Not Short - I'm Fun Size". I have several friends that are shorter than me and considered whether they would find this entertaining or insulting if they received it as a gift. Actually, I think I am shrinking down to fun-size myself. We keep track of our sons' growth on the wall next to the kitchen pantry. The last time we were all together we lined up for measuring. I have to get on a stool to measure the boys as they are several inches over six foot now. Because of that, they don't have to get on a stool for me, even though I am a tall woman. On my turn, I was shocked to find I had lost a half an inch. I was sure that with yoga I would stay the same size forever. It was disheartening as this is one of those "you are getting old" signs.

I find I have been more focused on getting my yoga students to lengthen their spine and stand up taller in all of their poses since my shrinking revelation. "Try to touch your head to the ceiling" I say as they practice their tree pose. I guess I am hoping somehow to regain that lost half of an inch or keep them from being the bottom mark on the measuring wall at their house.

Maybe my husband just tilted the ruler when he measured me so I would think I was getting shorter - how funny would that be? Or maybe I should just accept my new Fun Size!

A Humbling Experience

2011-09-19T15:04:00.003-05:00

I was interviewing an executive friend of mine for one of several books I always seem to have in progress - "You Don't Look Like an Engineer!". We discussed her career and I asked her if she had any advice for a new leader. "Remain humble", she replied. "I always try to remain humble. I know I don't know everything and I know I can learn from everyone." I know it came naturally to her but it doesn't always come so easily to the rest of us.

The yoga mat can be the most innocent of humbling devices you may ever come across. So many times I hear comments from students about how flexible they used to be, the things they used to be able to do, how they didn't know they were going to sweat. Or there is usually someone making the competitive comment before we start - "How hard can a little stretching be?". And then the crying and the whining start. Ok - maybe not really crying, but I do hear whining. It can be an especially humbling experience for those that are used to being in charge and excelling at other areas of their life. I encourage them to relax, consider it a benchmark, pay attention to the feelings in their body breathe. I suggest they modify the pose to make the pose work for them and be open to taking things a little more slowly. It is hard for them to give in - but it is not giving up. Some day soon they will be laughing about that first day.

It is a lesson for us all - no matter what our position in life - to be open to learning from everyone and everything - even something as innocent looking as a rubber mat.

What Are You Afraid Of?

2011-08-20T13:13:00.002-05:00

I started a group on Facebook called Fun N' Fit to promote fun activities involving fitness. Our next event is this afternoon at 4:00 p.m. We are doing a yoga pose freeze flash mob. If you are not familiar with the concept - it is an event that happens in a crowded area. One person will start singing a song or dancing a routine out of the blue and within a short time a whole "mob" has emerged out of the crowd to join them. The song or dance finishes and the participants fade back into the crowd. We are going to meet at the fountain at the local mall today and freeze in a yoga pose for two minutes. Our original plan was to do a yoga warm-up routine but we simplified it to a single pose because many students were too fearful of performing it in the mall. Enthusiasm and participant count has been steadily growing since the change.

As the hour draws near I find myself getting a little nervous - which is so out of the ordinary for me. What if no one shows up? (we are meeting 15 minutes early in front of the chocolate store to assure we have enough for a go). What if we get arrested? (we called the mall and let them know we would be doing it and received no objection - and our state and city hasn't made a flash mob illegal yet - so we should be safe - besides I have another instructor set up to teach my class tomorrow if I am unavailable - aka locked up). What if I can't hold a pose for two minutes? (I told students that it was ok if they had to drop their arms or switch their pose to the other foot - it will not be a problem). So every concern has been taken care of.

I recently sent out some marketing packages for my creativity and innovation classes and need to make some follow-up calls - yet I hesitate. What am I afraid of?

It sound like the yoga pose freeze flash mob is perfectly timed. Not only does it encourage people to engage in fitness activities and fun but sometimes the activities can be a little scary. But if we participate and push ourselves out there, we gain back our fearless selves - ready to conquer the world.

I have a feeling at 4:03 today I won't be afraid anymore - how about you?

If You Do It I'll Do It

2011-07-24T19:06:00.004-05:00

I occasionally plan adventures for my yoga class. We gather at a local park in the fall and spring when the weather is crisp to do yoga at sunset by the man made lake. We've been to the beach in the heat of the summer when the sand sticks to you everywhere and you have to run into the water between poses to cool off -- and in the fall when you reach your hand down to balance yourself in a pose and feel the cool sand instead.

I was teaching a class in the club and a scaffold ladder was in the back corner. The maintenance people used it to reach the lights of the two story high ceiling to change them out. Seeing the structure reminded me of a trip to Jamaica a few years back where the entertainment at the resort one night was a circus performance. They set up a trapeze and net near the outdoor dining area and invited guests to fly the trapeze during the day. I tried it out. I was a great advertisement for the activity. Everyone would ask where all the screaming was coming from (it was squeals of excitement - not fear - ok, maybe a little fear). I told my yoga students that I was going to find a place for us to trapeze so that they could enjoy the same thrills I had on the beach that day.

I was able to find a trapeze school school not too far away - in Austin - and started to organize a trip. Leaving class one night, I came across a few students talking out in the gym parking lot. I asked if they were going to go on the trapeze trip. They turned and looked at each other, said they were just talking about it and at the same time said, "If she does it, I'll do it!".

Scary events are easier when someone is there to do it with you. Some students are afraid of a pose but I am able to get them to try it - or at least some version of it - by encouraging them, breaking it down into easier steps, doing it with them or holding them up.

If you do it, I'll do it.

I did it. Your turn.

What's Your Story?

2011-06-21T13:15:00.003-05:00

I took a walk along the beach in Grand Cayman - the water was turquoise, the sand a beautiful barely beige, bright blue sky as far as I could see and a cruise ship docked at the end of the island unloading tourists. They dropped them off so they could join the party at one part of the beach called the Reef. Hundreds of college students focused on drinking, tanning and making connections. I passed through the short stretch of chaotic beach and soon was walking in the calm again. When I returned to my beach chair, I found a couple with vividly colored matching towels had planted themselves in the sand a few feet from my beach spot. I offered them a beach chair that my brother had recently vacated, as he was a snorkeler and not a sun bather, and the conversation began.

They were originally from England, but were now living in Spain. They owned a restaurant/bar that I hoped to visit before they moved back to England in the fall after their daughter's wedding. The gentleman worked in the film industry building sets for movies. Their future son-in-law was a professional bicycle rider, soon to be riding the Tour De France. I wrote down his name so that I could look him up on the Internet when I returned to techno reality. They only had a few short hours before they had to return to the cruise ship, and this part of the beach had been recommended to them. I'm glad they found it and me and I found them and their story.

In yoga class I like to find out my students' stories - why they were there?, what did they want or need from yoga?, what did they do for work and for fun?, what made them come back?, did they want to go on a field trip to Austin to fly on the trapeze?... (thought I would slip that one in there!). There is always a story and it is always interesting to me.

People are so different - it is what makes life interesting. When we do the tree pose (i.e. standing balance) in class I always say - "All the trees in the forest are different and that is what makes the forest so interesting, all of your tree poses are different and that is what makes you so interesting".

Share your story.

The Road to Hana

2011-06-07T02:33:00.006-05:00

As I basked in the beauty of my tropical surroundings absorbing my daily requirement of vitamin D from the sun, I was reminded of a trip I took to Hana a few years back on the island of Maui. The road to Hana is an incredible day trip full of waterfalls, underwater caves, trails, and black sand beaches - definitely not to be missed for those visiting the island. It is recommended that you start your trip with a visit to a little convenience store on the corner to purchase a self-guided tour on CD, load up on snacks and drinks, and jump in your car. If you miss that step you might miss the whole point of the Road to Hana.

It is a delightful day of frequent stops to enjoy scenic event after event - some involve climbing, traipsing along a trail, jumping in an underwater cave or just standing by a rushing waterfall enjoying the roar and the mist. Some adventures are not for the light of heart - many stand on the shore and watch the crazier ones dare the waves to crash over them. Once you reach Hana you are cautioned to turn around and head back in the opposite direction of how you arrived for the road ahead can be lonely and treacherous. The car rental companies warn you they will not rescue you if you decide to ignore the warnings and continue your way around the back side of the island.
"Ah - let's do it" - my husband smiled. And we did. Granted - some turns were a little "hairy" - with seemingly nothing between us and the ocean but the air. Once in a while we saw another car but they were very few and very far between. A few curves made me hold my breath but he was very careful and we were never in any real danger. My concern was reaching civilization again before the sun set so we could see where we were going as those mountain turns were no place to be in the dark. We did see a winery hidden in the hills and vowed to return the next day to check it out (from the opposite direction). We made it home to our hotel safe and sound.

"Hana?" a friend exclaimed as I detailed our trip on our return. "I drove to Hana and it wasn't all that spectacular - what is all the hoopla about?" he asked. "Did you stop at the little party store and pick up the CD", Did you stop along the way to see the waterfalls, the black sand beach, the underwater caves, the forest trails?" I asked. All his answers were "no". "Then you missed it all" I lamented. "It is not Hana itself, but the Road to Hana that is so heavenly".

In yoga, students are always asking "When willI be flexible", "How long will it take for me to be able to do that pose?", ... I would respond that "we have all the time in the world - our whole life. Enjoy the journey. It is all practice - yoga develops patience my dears - enjoy the road (to Hana)."

Disconnected at last...

2011-05-25T15:10:00.003-05:00

I was sitting in the gate area at the airport awaiting boarding for my flight to a Caribbean paradise. I just finished a call to my husband telling him we needed to take more vacations as I could already feel the stress melt away just thinking about my destination. I turned off the data reception on my phone before powering it down. No e-mails, no texts, no calls for four whole days. I experienced no sign of panic as the cell phone icon faded out - just peace as I imagined myself on the beach in my lounge chair, cold beer in hand, with the crystal turquoise water crashing up on the shore.

I recalled a recent conversation in which a friend stated with great pride that he had only taken one short vacation in the three years he had been with his company. "Why?" - I asked. It was such a foreign crazy concept to me. "The work just builds up while I am away and they can't live without me", he replied. How sad - for one to believe it, for two not to train someone to cover your work so you can escape and for three for the company to encourage this behavior and somehow think it is a good thing or to allow it.

We need recovery time.

I am often surprised how people cannot seem to turn off their phones for a short hour - whether it is in church or in yoga class - to have a peaceful experience. The world will survive without them, their friends can wait an hour for a response. You have to let yourself escape for your health.

We always rest at the end of yoga class in silence, on the floor on our backs letting everything sink into the floor completely relaxed. For some people it may be the only two minutes all day they really relaxed. It is so good for you. Turn it off. See how long you can last. Don't take that phone with you for one short errand. It is freeing.

I'll Come to Class After I Get Flexible

2011-05-25T14:44:00.002-05:00

We all have those lists. Those things we want to do once we get to a certain point in life. Once we weigh a certain amount we will buy those fancy jeans. When we get enough money we are going to take that trip. When the kids are grown up we will finally have some free time...

I hear people say it all the time - "I can't do yoga, I'm not flexible. I'll work on getting flexible and then I will come to your class." I have to tell them - that is why you need to come now - to get flexible. If you wait until you are - the day will never get here.

See you in class.

On My Honor I Will Try

2011-05-25T14:14:00.003-05:00

I was presenting on Creativity to a group of over 200 people at a dinner meeting of quality professionals and project managers. I mentioned a psychological study that found the more creative people think they are - the more creative they actually are. I then said we were going to TRY to change their perception of their creative selves and unleash their creative spirit. Then I laughed as I realized my blunder. I explained that I teach a course on Presentation Skills and I encourage the presenters to avoid the use of tentative phrases (i.e. try, hope). They should be confident and say "we will" or "we are going to". I asked the audience if any of them were ever boy scouts and a scattering raised their hands. "Do you remember the boy scout motto?" I asked, and a few of those hands dropped. "It starts off with - on my honor I will" I exclaimed. "How about girl scouts? any former girl scouts in the audience?" and several hands went up. "How does the girl scout motto begin?" I queried. "On my honor I will try... boy scouts will do it and girl scouts will try" I exclaimed. But tonight we WILL - change your perception of your creative self." And they were on board - and we did!

In yoga class I always tell them it is a practice not a performance. That we are going to try to do the poses and do the best we can, while always backing off if it doesn't feel right. And they TRY - and eventually they DO the pose.

Are you "trying" or are you "doing"? Even if you are only "trying" you will find that one day you end up "doing" too.

What's Going On in the Closet?

2011-05-08T20:17:00.009-05:00

I am an avid recycler. I will even bring plastic bottles and cans home from an event to recycle them if the party doesn't have a recycle bin. I keep a large plastic tub in the closet under the stairs just for plastic. I returned home early one evening from running errands and had the dry cleaning in my right hand. I opened the closet door to lean in and throw my plastic water bottle from my left hand into the bin, with my back to the door and the door started closing on me, leaving me in the closet in the dark. I knew my husband was home and thought he was trying to be funny and close me in the closet. I started laughing and called out to him. Then I turned and saw that a strap from one of the just cleaned tops had wrapped around the door handle pulling the door closed as I leaned forward toward the recycle bin. I started laughing and came out of the closet. He was across the room smiling but a bit confused - wondering why I was shutting myself in the closet. When we both realized what had really happened, we had a good laugh.

Every event has two sides to it. We need to be open to the possibility that our view is not the only possible interpretation.

In yoga class I try not to assume what people are thinking. Though sometimes I will talk out loud expressing thoughts I imagine they are thinking. From their reactions I find that I am frequently dead on.

Sometimes the stories we are imagining are a lot more fun than the reality. Come out of the closet and be open to the possibility that your view is not the only view.

Smells So Good

2011-05-01T00:59:00.004-05:00

I worked in downtown Detroit one summer during college as an engineering intern and remember the morning drive very well. My least favorite part was getting up before the crack of dawn to meet my car pool. It was the getting up part, not the car pool members, that was difficult. They were a fun bunch of older gentlemen. A few of us were always packed into the back seat and the back seat guys would tease, offering the driver money if he would take the next turn sharply so I would fall over. I would grab the handle hanging from the ceiling and laugh that I wasn't going to "fall" for that trick. My most favorite part of the drive was smelling the freshly baking bread as we neared downtown and the Wonderbread plant. The Stroh's brewery smelled pretty good too! Now, I occasionally work in downtown Houston and it has its own unique smells. My favorite here is the smell of coffee wafting from the Maxwell House plant. I've never been able to figure out why something that smells so good tastes so bad to me. I have to resort to Diet Cokes to wake me up in the morning.

Yoga can smell pretty good too. As I walked about the yoga room among my students this morning, I noticed how great everyone smelled, fresh from the shower. I commented how great my yoga students always smell and they laughed. ("Wait 'til the end of class" - one character whispered to me as I passed by).

I was reading an article in the paper today that detailed the royal wedding, including the flowers that were in Kate's bouquet. It included lilies of the valley. My mother always had a patch of lilies of the valley on one side of the house. They were my favorite (second only to the tulips she had growing on the other side of the house). Just reading about the bouquet brought back memories of the scent of those flowers and my mother. Later this evening we were returning to our car after a great baseball win by the Astros. My son and his friend were walking with us. My arm brushed a cascade of flowers growing on a fence and the floral scent filled the air. I turned back to look at the boys and teased - don't forget to stop and smell the flowers!

Don't miss out on the whole experience around you - make sure you take in the scents as well as the sights.

Feel Good Kind of Show

2011-04-27T15:09:00.005-05:00

It was definitely a "feel good" kind of show. One of those TV shows that makes you feel great watching it and for days after as you tell other people about it. Tears of joy, excitement, and fun mixed with very talented singers. I found myself e-mailing all my friends about it and talking about it with a big smile on my face the next day and beyond.

I only have two shows that I don't like to miss - a game show and a late night show. Last week a preview aired right before my late night show. It started with four very popular singers who are the coaches on the show (i.e. Cee-lo Green, Adam Levine, Blake Shelton and Christina Aguilera) belting out the song "Crazy" by Gnarls Barkley like I've never heard it sung before. It also didn't hurt that the contestant they featured was a good looking cowboy with a great voice. The show was fun and I was captivated. I raced home from teaching my cycle class last night to see the premiere. Expecting a one hour show, I was delighted that it turned out to be two. Incredibly talented singers tried out in blind auditions. Each one's story was revealed and their audition presented along with the battle between the coaches for the singers they liked. Ultimately the singer gets to pick who they work with. If none of the coaches pick the singer, it is disappointing but the coaches still have encouraging and positive responses for them. I can't wait for next week and the next show - The Voice.

I am sometimes tired when I get to yoga class, or frustrated from events of the work day. It never fails that once I start teaching and working with my students, and enjoying their hard work that I forget all my troubles and find new energy. At the end of class I thank them for letting me play with them and we all leave feeling better than when we came in the door.

It's a Feel Good Kind of Class and our Feeling Good Kind of Shows (to everyone else that we come across)!

It's the Little Things That Make a Big Difference

2011-04-04T18:01:00.009-05:00

There was a new furniture store in town that sounded interesting - rooms of furniture ready to go. I drove by the brightly colored building many times and finally had a few minutes one day to peek my head inside and see what the fuss was all about. An interesting table with bar high cushy chairs in a chocolate black color caught my attention (when doesn't chocolate anything catch my attention?). It was unusual because of the shape of the table - a rounded triangle. The bench seat on one side reminded me of the bench we had at our kitchen table when I was a kid. It was difficult to get eight kids around a table without a bench on one side. I loved to lay down on that bench after dinner, sometimes resting, sometimes just avoiding the inevitable homework. I didn't really need a new dining room table, so I put a picture of it in my head for future reference. We've been redoing some rooms in the house, replacing a few things, and it came time to redo the dining room. I went back to the store to search for that perfect table that I came across so long ago - and was delighted to find it was still available. It is so perfect for my husband's poker nights and our frequent game nights at the house. In preparation for its delivery, we moved some furniture in the dining room. The china cabinet, weighted down with years of collecting wine glasses and wine to fill them, hadn't been moved in an embarassing number of years. We simply moved it one wall over (ok - I admit - not simply - it had to be emptied first, and strong neighbor boys had to be commisioned to come over and move it - which was easily accomplished with promises of baked goods) and the whole room opened up. It was amazing how a simple thing made such a huge difference. You can walk through the room without running into a table or chair - positive Feng Shui.

In yoga I move about the room during class, gently making adjustments to student's poses. It doesn't take much for them to feel a big difference. I give them modifications and ways to make a start with a complicated pose. I try to remember names, and try to get around the room and make eye contact, a positive comment or a light touch to everyone. It's the little things that make a big difference.

Really? Es verdad? (is that true?)

2011-03-14T16:02:00.003-05:00

I was preparing for an international vacation and called my cell phone company to check on the call, text and e-mail rates and charges while I traveled. I provided the representative with all of my information and secret passwords for account access. When she found out the reason for my call, she said she would have to transfer me to the international department. Once connected, I again had to provide all of my numbers and secret passwords. I asked the representative why they didn't have that in the system. "Believe me, I know. It frustrates me as much as it frustrates you", he replied in a monotone, scripted, said it for the 16th time today fashion. So unbelievable, I thought. At least it wasn't as frustrating as the last time when I was transferred five times with all the information repeating, I told myself as I tried to look at it in a positive way.

The fake truth is rampant. I assisted my son on a walk-through inspection of his new house prior to closing. The salesman gave several mini speeches of half truths including the ever so irritating - "I'm looking out for these kids like they are my own children". Really? I was thinking it was more like he was looking out for his own commission on the sale of this mansion. Es verdad? (is that true?)

Then there is yoga. I never have to wonder with my students. Their sincerity shows through in every breath, every exertion, every laugh as they tumble to the floor struggling through a pose and every "I feel great, thank you" at the end of every class.

In yoga - no posers - just poses. Verdad (truly).

Voracious

2011-03-14T15:43:00.002-05:00

The grapes popped and exploded with flavor as I crushed down on the handful I had placed in my mouth. I am a voracious eater. I love food and believe handfuls of grapes, popcorn or M&M's taste so much better than eating them one at a time. There is something about the crunch and flavor explosion that cannot be dismissed. Fortunately, I am as voracious an exerciser and do not have a problem with my weight.

Recently, I bought a bag of crunchy red grapes. I pulled off a handful, popped them in my mouth and started to crunch away - then stopped. Something was wrong - something besides grapes was in there. I discovered that a small piece of stem was still attached to every grape - they hadn't severed cleanly from the vine. I wasn't going to be able to pop delightful dozens into my mouth at a time. I was going to have to grab each one off the vine separately, separate the little stem piece and eat them one by one. I did. And guess what? They were delicious that way. One crunchy grape explodes with flavor just as nicely as a mouthful.

In yoga, some students try to do all the poses all out without paying attention to how they feel with each movement, whether they are going too far or whether they can push a little bit more. They don't slow down and listen to their body and back off if something doesn't feel right. They end up frustrated, tired or stressed and strained. They need to focus on each pose and each part of each pose a little more for greater enjoyment and safe stretching.

One by one, not the whole bunch - enjoy!

It's All Good

2011-03-03T01:33:00.003-06:00

It was the most perfect of days - the weatherman gave it a ten. There wasn't a cloud in the sky, the temperature was 72 and I was headed to the beach in the convertible with the most perfect of beach buddies soon to be in the car with me and the most perfectly packed cooler (chocolate, beer, strawberries and other goodies). I was momentarily delayed on our trip at a traffic light. I looked in the rear view mirror and noticed the guy behind me jammin' out on his steering wheel like a rock star drummer. Must be a good song - maybe I should go back there and ask him what it is - I thought. It would probably make a great tune for my cycling class! I smiled and headed to the rendevous spot for the beach thinking about the rough work week behind me and the relaxing day ahead. Mixing tough with fun. It's all good - I thought.

My yoga class tonight was the perfect size for personal attention - ten. We started with the basic warm-ups and moved on to class mixing beginner poses with challenging ones. Half of the class struggled with the challenging poses, losing their balance, sometimes tumbling gently to the floor laughing or making "say what?" comments when I mentioned where I wanted them to try to move their arm or their leg, but continuing to try. I told them it was all good. The fact that they were laughing and enjoying themselves through their struggles was a good sign. They weren't giving up but were enjoying the challenges and the little "ta-da" moments when part of a pose actually worked.

We all have struggles mixed with good times. It is how we approach it that makes all the difference. Stay on the positive side - it's all good.

We Are What Drives Us Crazy - Are We?

2011-02-27T15:08:00.003-06:00

I just started leading my Saturday morning yoga class in their sun salutations - a vigorous warm up before the real work begins. We were on our third round and I suddenly realized what I had said, stopped myself in mid cobra position (on my belly with chest raised) and started laughing as the class continued their string of poses, unphased by my break in the rhythm. They knew that there would be an explanation and that it would probably make them laugh too. They were used to it and enjoyed it - (that's what they tell me). It takes the edge off of the hard work they are performing.

I remained on the floor as I started my mini performance - an exaggerated description of the poses stretching out every other syllable as I spoke slowly and carefully. "Lunge deeeeeply into the pose as you breeeeeeathe slooooowly with eeeeeeach moooooovement" I said. I started to smile. "I can't believe it", I said. It has always driven me a little crazy to hear yoga instructors speak with that slow drawn out speak and I heard myself say one word - just one tiny word - during the sun salutation that gave the tiniest most micro-indication that I might be headed in the same direction of the yoga "rack" instructors - stretching out every word. Please no - not me.

At least when you are aware of something you can stop it. And I stopped it dead in its tracks right there.

But it was then that I realized that this may not be the only instance of my being what drives me crazy. I started a personal reality check.

I took a cycling class the other day and cringed every time the instructor screamed her zealous "eeeeeh" and "whoohoo" into the microphone in between the talking that never stopped and heavy breathing that reminded me I should be working as hard. It wasn't the expressions of enthusiasm that bothered me as much as her screaming it right into the mic at full volume. Then I thought about my own class and how often I express enthusiasm as I egg them on to work harder and bring themselves to that "can't talk - need CPR" zone. But I calmed myself as I realized I always push the mic to the side and I do stop talking (heck - I am just trying to breathe like they are) and all was well again in my yoga and cycling world.

They say (who are these "theys"? - and why do we listen to them?) - that those things that irritate us most about other people are actually a reflection of ourselves and our faults. Granted some of them are - but streeeeeeeeeetching out my words and screeching into the mic are not mine.

Keeping It Fresh and New

2011-01-03T00:41:00.004-06:00

The surgeon held the beating heart in his hand and gently turned it on end so that we could see the twisting motion of the left ventricle, like a towel twists when you wring it out. I was at the Pumps and Pipes Conference, a collaboration between heart surgeons and oil and gas engineers sharing their expertise and technology to solve each others "pump and pipe" problems. We were watching a live feed from an operating room a few buildings away at the medical center. I was grateful for the man laying on the table with his chest open who volunteered to allow us to view his bypass heart surgery. When I was in college I considered the specific discipline of bio-medical engineering within mechanical engineering, but never switched. Medicine and surgery have always fascinated me and the operation was amazing.

What I remember most are the words of the surgeon as he held the man's heart in his hand - "Isn't it incredible. Isn't it beautiful". Here was a doctor who has probably seen hundreds of hearts, if not thousands and his natural reaction was amazement and appreciation. This man truly loved his work.

This morning I drove downtown with the convertible top down on an incredibly sunny, though cold, day to teach two cycling classes in a row at the downtown gym. I had the heat on under my seat and the hot air blowing full blast as I clutched the steering wheel with my driving gloves on, wondering if the surrounding drivers thought I was crazy. (Probably!). I only teach at this gym occasionally, so it was a treat to work with a different crowd. Though the process is the same - warm them up, kick their booties, cool them down - and you don't really go anywhere, class is always a new adventure. The music changes, the people change (though there are always a few new faces - even in my regular classes), and their faces change as they struggle to survive. I like to teach at different gyms occasionally, just for something new. So, it always stays fresh and exciting.

In yoga class I try to work on different poses each time I teach so the members always get a different experience. I've taught for many years and still delight and enjoy it every time. Next week I will attend a yoga conference in San Francisco to learn new techniques and methods to keep my classes interesting. I am eager to return to my students and experiment with them. This retreat to one of the most beautiful and exciting cities I know is one way I keep it fresh and renew my attitude.

What will you do to continue to make your work new and exciting every time?

It is a new year. Keep it fresh. Keep it new. Happy New Year!

There's Something About the Water

2010-11-21T15:47:00.002-06:00

Our boys (6'3" - 195 pound solid muscle, eating machines) are coming home for the Thanksgiving holiday. Being the good mother that I am, I head out to stock up on seafood for the pre-Thanksgiving Day eating fenzy that is soon to begin. I always enjoy going to the waterfront for seafood, even moreso on days like this with the top down on the convertible. It is an adventure compared to driving over to the grocery store. I smile as I enter my favorite seafood store and find the usual guys behind the counter anxious to help me with my selection. I like to pick out fresh fish, looking for clear eyes, not cloudy, as a friend raised by a fisherman always instructed me. I attempt to speak Spanish as I make my requests to have the fish fileted, and end up learning a few new words in the process. The workers are always polite and seem entertained with my speech, making me wonder if I said what I thought I was saying!

With my bags of iced down shrimp, snapper and salmon in hand, I head out the door. As I walk down the steps of the building I notice a patch of sandy beach thirty or so yards off to the right and cannot help but drive in that direction before heading to the highway. There is something about the water that always draws me to it. I find a newly constructed gazebo to hang out on and spend some time just watching the waves crash in as sailboats float out on the water in the distance. I am mesmerized for a while, then regretfully head toward the car. But, I am consoled by the fact that I invited my yoga class members to meet me for yoga in the park later in the day - and there is a lake (fake - but a lake!) there to enjoy.

I wish everyone could have come, but only a few were able to enjoy yoga in the park today, Not a cloud in the sky, not an ant hill to avoid, not a mess left behind on the grassy hill by a dog to accidentally roll onto during a sun salutation - just perfect everything from the people to the sunset. As we lay in savasana (on our backs in corpse pose) after a welcome workout, I turned my head to the side and opened my eyes to see the sun setting and the water on the man-made lake rippling from the gentle wind blowing through the trees. There's something about the water - isn't there?

(Won't you join us next time? Check the schedule at www.iyogaparty.com for the next Yoga in the Park)

The First Step is the Hardest

2010-11-04T14:26:00.005-05:00

When they find out I am a yoga instructor, people usually respond with, "I really need to do yoga". They continue listing the things they used to be able to do and all of the things they can't do anymore. The reaction isn't limited to older individuals. I've heard the same responses from teenagers and twenty-somethings. I encourage them to join me at my next class, promise I will be nice to them and even give them a mat to use and some chocolate (a frequent give-away in my classes). It is always heartwarming to see them walk through the door that first time. Getting in the door or taking the first step is the hardest part of many ventures.

A new person walked into my cycling class this morning a few minutes late. I set him up on the bike and proceeded to lead the class through intense drills on flats and hills with entertaining and motivating music. I gave the new guy encouraging words throughout the session and told him that he had survived the hardest part - walking in the door. He hung in as long as he could and sheepishly slid off his bike after about 30 minutes, ready to call it quits. I told him that I only lasted 15 minutes the first time and I was very proud of him and that we all looked forward to him coming back the next week. He said he would. They always say they will as they internally shake their head from side to side! But I really think this one really will.

Sometimes the first step is the hardest to take - the first day of a diet, the first time we speak in public, the first time we create something and put it out there for reactions. The more steps we take, the easier it gets. Don't be afraid of that first step.

Scare Yourself Once a Day

2010-10-27T00:29:00.003-05:00

I lightheartedly tease some of my yoga students in class when they make faces. Sometimes the faces are because they are struggling in a pose. I remind them to breathe through their nose and tell them if their mouth is open they are working too hard. Other faces are on the new people when I mention what we are going to do during the class (i.e. stand on our hands and let our legs float up into the air while twisting them into various positions). I calm their fears by letting them know we are going to try and see what happens and you just never know. I let them know every pose has many steps to it and they might only take the first step that day and not go any farther and that is ok - so RELAX! The response is entertaining but they appear ready to go. No one bolts for the door. That is always a good sign.

I needed some encouraging words like that when I went to my last horseback riding lesson. I was going to have a lesson with another person - a very little person who seems to me to have no fear. She gets right up on this huge horse and follows the instructor's directions very calmly and precisely and happily. I was very calm and happy myself when I arrived until I found out that because the little person was on the mild horse, I was going to get to ride the Arabian. I call him the wild Arabian. He is in training (so am I). He doesn't like to stand still (which makes it exciting when you are trying to get up on him), he likes to go fast and he likes to dance around. I tend to prefer the mild horse that takes a little more to get her moving. Call me chicken - I don't mind! I am sure the horses do. I wish I could have had a picture of my face when the instructor told me I was going to get to ride the Arabian that day. And I thought my yoga students looked scared when I mentioned their legs floating up in the air.

Well - I did survive and actually did quite well on the Arabian. He was fun and challenging. I followed the instructor's directions very calmly and precisely and happily. I think I am over my fear of the wild Arabian until next time.

It is important to scare yourself a little every day. Get out of that comfort zone and see what you can really do.

Quick - Get the Camera

2010-10-10T20:23:00.008-05:00

I recently attended a yoga workshop with an instructor who goes by the name of "Yeah Dave". He combines yoga, chocolate and wine - which I have always been an avid supporter of. I enjoyed the workshop, the refreshments and Dave - as a good looking male instructor always keeps me present in the moment in class. Dave heavily promotes this concept and has a video clip on his WEB site of him interviewing people in Hawaii being present in the moment (how can you not be present in the moment in Hawaii?). He sent out a newsletter after the workshop inviting us to send him pictures of us being present in the moment. I immediately began to think of creative extraordinary things I could do and then photograph to submit in response to his request. Then I came to my senses.

Last night I held a "yoga on the beach" party. My best friend and I went to the beach a few hours before party time to enjoy the sun, waves and friend time as well as make sure we were the first ones at the party. As the start time for the beach games approached I was disappointed that hoards of yogis were not descending on the area we staked out with our Hillbillly Golf Game (i.e. a game similar to horsehoes but played with a ladder frame and golf balls on rope) and our yoga mats. I lamented that we might be the only ones. She wisely responded (as she so often does) that "many people really wanted to come but it was Saturday and they got caught up with Saturday things and the time slipped away from them. Besides it wouldn't be so bad with just the two of us." She was right. If no one else showed up we would get all the prizes (including the wine and beer - how awesome is that?) and I would get more time with my best friend who has been working so much lately I have hardly seen her.

I relaxed and the yogis started to arrive. Some came for the games and more came for the yoga. People around us stopped to watch. We invited them to join us but they just continued to watch. The weather was incredible. There wasn't a cloud in the sky, the water was clear, there wasn't any seaweed washed up on shore and the sand felt cool as you dug your fingers in to stay balanced in a pose. Some people from Florida or Hawaii won't come to the beach because it isn't Florida or Hawaii. They just haven't seen Galveston in October. If they only knew what they were missing their mat would have been next to mine on the beach.

The sun was getting close to setting as I invited the group to lie back on their mats, relax their legs and wiggle their toes, roll their head from side to side and let everything sink into the sand. Then, all we heard was the ocean, all we smelled was the clean cool air.

Quick - get the camera - snap a picture for Yeah Dave.

It's the Little Things In Life That Count the Most

2010-09-20T22:33:00.002-05:00

One of the guys from my weight lifting class was working out with his friend a few weeks ago. They were running on the treadmill. He felt "funny" and funny enough to go to the doctor and get checked out. Fortunately for him, they discovered a problem with his heart through a stress test before a major disaster and were able to take care of it with surgery. I asked our weight class to contribute healthy snacks to put in a basket for our weight lifting friend and bring them to class today. His workout partner was taking the basket to him after class. The workout partner came up to me and told me that people were great and that this was such a nice thing and he was so appreciative. It was a little thing but it made a big impact and I was grateful to be a part of that event.

My husband is traveling and I called him to ask him a question this afternoon. He commented that the phone calls were non-stop since he got off the plane but he had to answer this one (mine) because it was the most important one. I laughed and told him I appreciated his joking - but I really think he was serious - could he have been? It was a little thing but it made a big impact and I was grateful to be a part of the event.

This evening in yoga class I moved about the room adjusting people and assisting them in making it deeper into poses.I helped one guy move deeper into a triangle pose. I helped him turn and then lean a little farther over and then I moved onto the next person. He came up to me after class with a big smile on his face, saying the class tonight was the best ever and thanked me. It was a little thing but it made a big impact and I was grateful to be a part of the event.

Go do little things. They will make big impacts and you will be grateful to be a part of the event.

Keep On Truckin'

2010-09-11T23:42:00.004-05:00

I have had endless problems with my cell phone company as many of my friends well know. The latest episode involved a 40 minute telephone call to correct billing errors they made and a few trips to the store to exchange a phone that died - all in one day. After the call, I sat there on the verge of tears from the countless hours of frustration I racked up over the last six months and wondered - when is enough, enough? "Not until I get what I need!" I thought as I typed up a letter to the Chief Service Officer of the Company.

I admit, I am more persistent than most. I am always disappointed when I see new people leave the yoga room early in their first class. It doesn't happen very often, but it does happen. I wonder what I could have done differently to stop it. I am assured by the regulars that there wasn't anything I could have said or done differently. "Some people just give up more quickly than others", they say.

During class there are always people stopping, sitting down or laying down for a few minutes or more - finding a pose that works better for them at that moment. Some laugh as I demonstrate a pose with my hands on the floor and my feet in the air. I can hear their "no way" or the noises that tell me they are thinking "you have got to be kidding". But they stay. And they work through the poses and they rest when they need to and "no way" turns into "some day". And there they are - with their hands on the floor and their feet in the air.

Keep on truckin'!

Be Careful What You Say

2010-09-06T10:48:00.005-05:00

My younger son, a true engineer, was designing a beverage holder for his golf bag and had a six pack of Coke that he was using in his experiment out in the garage. He left for college and the experiment was left behind. I brought the Cokes into the house to get them out of the heat (for fear they might explode sitting out in the garage) and left them on the barstool to empty and recycle later.

That night my husband and I came in from a fun evening playing games at a friend's house - if you call losing to my husband every time we play a game fun. Actually we are able to take him down occasionally, just not last night. As I walked in the door I noticed the floor dirty from all the barbecuing and just people walking in and out of the house earlier that day. I declared loudly that I was going to call my friend's maid to clean the house because I just couldn't mop the floor one more time. I was so tired of cleaning the floor and was ready for my "back to school" treat - the maid. Every summer when the boys leave for college I treat myself to a house cleaning by a professional and I was ready.

As I walked past the bar stools heading to the computer room to shut off my laptop for the night, I knocked the stool where I had placed the Coke cans earlier in the day. The cans hit the floor exploding into rivers of Coke running along the grout grooves and then just pouring over the tiles, splashing onto the couch and chair (thank goodness for easy clean up leather). I let loose a few words of surprise, resigned myself to pulling out the mop, bleach and pail and mopped the floor - one more time!

In yoga, I was settling down on my mat in the front of the room as the last of the Zumba dancers from the class before mine exited the room. I saw an instructor and another friend heading out the door and lightheartedly gave them a hard time for not staying for yoga. The instructor said her body just couldn't handle getting tied up in a pretzel that night. I started to laugh because some times I have a theme night (like head and shoulders - headstands and shoulder stands) and tonight was "pretzel night" - with a plan for a lot of twists and human pretzel poses. The class looked at me with fear in their eyes when I revealed that to them after her comment.

Be careful what you say - you just might get it.

In My Space - In My Face

2010-09-04T17:43:00.013-05:00

I was able to board the plane early thanks to my husband's frequent flying privileges. I was on my way to meet him to play in his company's annual golf tournament. It would be a welcome but short get-away from the Texas heat. I was pleased the airline switched our plane from the original itsy bitsy teeny tiny express jet it was supposed to be - to a 737. It resulted in more empty seats than I expected, which is always nice for the passengers but not the airline. I took my window seat in the exit row that I love for the extra room for my extra long legs. Other passengers continued to board the plane.

Eventually a gentleman - good looking to boot - entered my row and took the aisle seat. He was engaged in a cell phone conversation that he continued with until the main cabin door was closed and all cell phones had to be turned off. He hung his jacket on the tray table hook of the seat between us as he sat down. Throughout the flight he was pleasant, occasionally making a comment regarding happenings on the plane. He perused one part of his newspaper keeping the other sections in the seat between us. It ended up holding his jacket (which moved there when he lowered the middle seat tray table to make a place for his drinks), wallet, napkin and a few other assorted articles. He lowered his own tray table to make room for his laptop and remained engaged in his work for most of the flight - until his three beers (or was it four? - I blame it on my wine!) at high altitude kicked in!

With his beers spread out on the middle tray table and his belongings filling the chair between us, I suddenly felt a little claustrophobic. My space was being taken over ever so subtly. I placed my wine cup (I wish I'd brought my own real glass) on the tray table between us, opened my bottle and poured myself a glass on "his" tray table, leaving mine empty. I smirked as I started to edge into his space - looked out the window at the beautiful sunset and smiled. "I'll bet he doesn't even realize what he did or that I am writing about him" - I thought.

He really turned out to be quite a nice fellow. We talked after dinner about our work and families as his beers kicked in and his desire to focus on his work waned. I am sure he didn't mean to take over the space like he did. But a real gentleman (like my husband) would have asked if I minded if he used the open seat or table or if we could share.

I was reminded of the space on the plane issue the other day when a gym member I had not seen in a long time ran into me after my class. She moved in very close while she was talking. I wanted to take a step back but was up against a wall already. I thought maybe it was just because she is a hair dresser and usually gets right up next to people to work on them that she was so comfortable being so close. I laughed to myself as it almost seemed absurd and wondered if I "got in people's space" too.

In yoga I try to respect people's space. I do not step on their mats. I let people know I am near if their head is down and they don't see me coming. I gently touch their shoulder as a warning. I ask permission to adjust their pose.

It is ok to be in other people's space - just ask permission first.

Do What You Say You Are Going to Do

2010-08-27T01:49:00.003-05:00

It sounded like a good idea at the time. The 6:00 am cycling instructors were going on vacation and needed subs for their classes for two weeks. I signed up for it and then the alarm went off at 4:45 am. It was then I first questioned my sanity (actually I have questioned it many times before - usually when it involves getting my body out of bed before the sun is warm). Surely I had been out of my mind when I agreed to get up before the crack of dawn to lead others in exercise. I jumped out of bed quickly before my body realized what was happening to it and jumped in the shower to wake up. Actually, it is a really amazing thing to get up when the moon and stars are out and the night air is still a bit cool as you head to the gym to exercise. I wonder where all of those other people I see on the road are going at this crazy hour of the morning. What amazes me even more is the fact some people are actually leaving the gym when I arrive at 5:30 a.m. - they are finished with their workout. What time did they start?

By the time we are into our warm-up in class I am starting to feel alive and considering conversion to morning person status. When I leave the gym the sun is rising and a new day has already begun and life is good.

So - I thought. I shouldn't keep this incredible experience all to myself. I want all of my yoga students to experience this pre-dawn awesomeness too. I mentioned it to my yoga class that next night. I told them I would be teaching cycling class in the morning and they should join me. "You will be done with your workout before your body knows it is awake!" - I promised with a devilish smile. Two college age girls came up to me all excited after class to say they would be there. Two other women said "they might" and I knew they meant well but I could guarantee I would not see them in the morning.

The next morning, as class began promptly at 6:00 a.m., I looked hopefully about the room but didn't see any of the ladies that said they would or they might be in class. Just as I was about to lose all hope - which is tragic for a hopelessly optimistic person - two energetic young girls walked into the room and set up on bikes near the front of class - my two "we will be there" girls. The "mights" never showed up.

If you say you will - you will. If you say you might - you probably won't.

I love people who do what they say they are going to do.

High Expectations

2010-08-06T01:14:00.003-05:00

I know I am guilty of high expectation syndrome. I expect a lot of things and I am sometimes disappointed. A friend once suggested I try not to expect anything and I will never be disappointed. I never adopted his philosophy. I prefer to keep my optimistic attitude and most of the time it serves me well.

Over the weekend I enjoyed a great time with family and friends. Our Sunday was highlighted with church, relaxing by the pool and playing games in the backyard. I took my son, his girlfriend and their friend out to dinner at our favorite Italian restaurant in the area. We were seated within a few minutes and were looking forward to the friendly,entertaining service and incredible food we have always experienced there. Within a few minutes we all had the feeling it was not going to go well. From the minute the waitress said "I'll be with you in a sec" that expanded into what felt like ten minutes or more, we knew we were doomed. A problem here and there is not a big deal and they are easily brushed off, but that evening they snowballed. The waitress certainly wasn't new, she just had the wrong attitude that matched her poor service. A floor manager walked up to the table and asked the perfunctory "how is everything tonight?". When I politely responded "not so good" and explained why, she merely responded repeatedly with "I'm sorry" but never did anything to correct the situation. We were soon out the door feeling cheated of a good dining experience and left with a disappointing ending to an otherwise wonderful day.

I know that my yoga students have expectations when they come into class. Some think we are just going to relax and breathe the whole time, others think they will have to be a contortionist, and some have no idea what to expect. I try to explain in the beginning how the class will go - starting with breathing exercises, then "almost aerobic" sun salutations, then everything will slow down, ... I remind them to pay attention to their body and the messages it sends them. I encourage them to take breaks when they need them - and they WILL need them. I can't explain everything that they will enjoy during the class but I like to clarify some expectations. I hope that settles their mind a bit and helps them enjoy the experience.

I can't wait to hear the restaurant owner's response to my letter!

So Many People, So Little Time

2010-07-26T12:47:00.009-05:00

I come from a very large family by today's standards. I have seven brothers and sisters. Our dad passed away last year one day shy of his 91st birthday. We celebrated his life with an Irish Catholic service complete with a bagpiper and whiskey shots at the cemetery on a beautiful Michigan Memorial Day ending it all with a sprinkling of rain and a double rainbow (go Irish - go leprechauns!)

I was teaching a business class in the fall on Personal and Professional Effectiveness and was covering some ideas from the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey. He asks us to ask ourselves "What is the one thing in my personal life that I am not doing now that if I did, it would make a significant positive impact on my personal life?". The question is asked in regard to your professional life also. I posed the questions to the class. To give them ideas I presented my answers. In my professional life I want to learn Spanish so I can teach my business and fitness classes in Spanish in foreign countries. I started years ago but need to ramp up my studies if I am going to make that goal any time soon. When it came to my personal life I immediately thought of my dad. Out of nowhere I said I would call my brothers and sisters every month in order to keep in touch and keep them connected (and that is no small task considering there are seven of them and some of those phone calls can last hours!). I started that night, though I already had credit for a few since I regularly call some of them, even talk to them daily. Some were a little concerned at first when they answered the telephone, thinking someone had died. And quickly let go a sigh of relief when they heard I just wanted to say "Hi" and see what was up. It has turned out to be a wonderful goal. I hear the delight in their voices when they hear it is me just calling to catch up. Some of them never think about calling, they get so busy with their lives, so I am glad I started this. I have already added my mother-in-law to the list. I am thinking of adding all of my husband's brothers and sisters - but remember - that is another large Catholic family! Why not?

I taught yoga Saturday to a very full class. There were mats lined up against the back wall. Near the end of class I was looking at the back wall people and realized I hadn't made it back there very often during class to adjust them, offer a comment or demonstrate a pose next to them. I like to touch everyone, look at everyone or just make a positive comment on how hard they are working if I can. It is important. Tonight I will try to do just that - make sure I "touch" everyone in the class at least once every time. What a positive impact that will have.

One gym I work at has a goal of touching 24 millions lives with our fitness classes this year. I better get started. So many yoga students, so little time.

Soft Hands, Warm Heart

2010-07-19T17:17:00.008-05:00

I was walking out of the grocery store toward my car and noticed an elderly gentleman walking toward me headed into the store. I say elderly because he was probably in his 80's but, he certainly didn't act elderly. He walked unassisted with a bit of a lively sprint in his gait. He wore a baseball cap on his head proudly sporting some military insignia USS... but he was walking so fast (remember?) I didn't get a chance to focus and read it. As he was about to pass me something dropped from his pocket. It was a small package of Kleenex. I said "Whoops, wait" as I hastened to pick it up. He turned back and I placed the package in his hand. As my hand touched his I noticed how soft it was, yet strong. It reminded me of my father's hand. My dad passed away last year leaving behind a lifetime of wonderful memories. In his last years I loved to visit him at his assisted living residence and sit on the porch with him shooting the breeze. Occasionally another resident or an employee would join us in conversation. I usually held his frail soft hand in mine. He would squeeze it every so often, a silent way of letting me know he was glad I was there.

As I smiled and bid the gentleman in the parking lot a good day, I started to cry a little bit as I thought of my dad. The gentleman couldn't see my tears under my dark sunglasses, just my smile and he cheerfully thanked me and strode off into the store.

In yoga class I frequently touch members to encourage them to go deeper into a pose or to let them know I am near and might be giving them further assistance. In the winter I try to rub my hands together first to warm them up before I touch them so I don't shock them. I hope my touch is soft and gentle and encouraging.

I can still feel his hand in mine.

The Perfect Party

2010-07-14T23:31:00.003-05:00

I was invited to a personal shower for the future daughter-in-law of my friend. I love parties and really enjoy meeting new people. I behaved myself with the present I purchased which is so unlike me - a Victoria Secret gift certificate and Godiva chocolates. You really can't go wrong there.

I knew the moment my girlfriend and I pulled up in the drive-way it was going to be the "perfect" party. The pool in the backyard had the perfect fountain of water spraying over the perfectly clear water. The lawn was perfectly manicured. When we entered the house all of the women were perfectly behaved, standing or sitting, talking about perfectly appropriate party subjects. Two perfectly groomed poodles greeted us and later sat in the lap of the hostess - behaving as perfect poodles do. The table was beautifully set with little sandwiches and punch and a - you guessed it - perfectly decorated cake that matched the picture on the invitation. We were going to have dinner as a group after the shower so I tried to save my appetite but the cake kept calling to me. I can resist a store bought cake but I overheard that this one was baked by the hostess' work friend and she makes divine cakes. So I cut a small slice (that could fit into my mouth in one bite) and placed it on my napkin. I lifted the cake with my fingers and dropped it into my mouth and wow - what a delight and what a mistake. It was now going to be extremely difficult to resist getting more. I failed miserably at resisting. I ended up back at the table and sliced a much bigger piece of cake and again placed it on a napkin. My friend and the hostess happened to be standing next to me at the table this time. The hostess tried to put a plate under my napkin as I enjoyed the cake piece by piece. I let her put the plate under my cake but never did make it to the fork before I finished it off. It just tastes better to me when it can be enjoyed that way. The hostess kept a straight face but inside I am sure she was horrified. Maybe she never lived with five brothers or a houseful of men. I enjoy visiting the perfect party where everything is in its perfect place and sometimes wish mine was the same way - but I am much more comfortable when I can eat my cake my way!

I jest about the "perfectness" of the party. It really was a delightful afternoon and I immensely enjoyed the women I met. I sometimes have the perfect house too. Whenever we have a party all of the imperfections get fixed and cleaned and the house looks perfect when guests arrive. That is one of the reasons I love to have parties.

I consider my yoga class a party. Though we don't have cake and punch I like to make sure people have a good time. In my class there is no "perfect" - no perfect pose, no perfect anything - just practice. I like my members to smile, to laugh, to groan, to be creative with their poses and do their best with what they have. I try to emphasize the "relaxed - do what you can" atmosphere right away so everyone enjoys class and new people are not intimidated.

And sometimes - I even see some perfect poses.

Trash and Treasure

2010-06-27T21:58:00.002-05:00

I was outside washing the car and heard a pick-up truck rounding the corner. I looked up to see a red truck making its way around the cul-de-sac with its bed overflowing with "stuff". I smiled because it was probably the usual (night before trash pick-up) recycling bandits. I think they are absolutely great. They drive through the neighborhood checking out people's trash to see if they can find any treasures. We helped one of them load our old washing machine onto his truck many moons ago. He knew a place that paid for scrap metal and that is where he took many of his trash treasures. Other items left on the curb are garage sale leftovers and would become very useful to that special someone willing to take the time to sand and repaint or repair a broken part. It's not for everybody but I am glad for those who do enjoy it.

The same can be said for yoga. There are some out there who will "trash" my treasure.
"Oh, that is too hard"
"I can't do that, I am not flexible enough"
"I don't get into all that chanting and incense stuff" (which we don't do in my classes - gym yoga is different than studio yoga)
If they only knew. If they just took a little time to investigate what it really is about, they would find a yoga that was perfect for them. There are so many types out there, I am sure there is one that will work for every body (I split that word on purpose!).

Like the recycling bandits, look around and check things out. You are sure to find a yoga instructor and class that is a treasure for you.

The Line Kept Getting Longer and Longer

2010-06-21T14:26:00.003-05:00

I was looking for a checkout line and peered hopefully down the long line of unlit register lights to see only three or four scattered lights. I made my way to the closest one and was delighted to find that my favorite cashier was on duty. There is something about this checker. He is the best customer service person I have ever come across in my entire life (wow - that is something to say!). He is cheerful, friendly, easy going, helpful and can calm down the most unpleasant customer with a few words. I quickly made my way into his line. I watched him take care of the customer in front of me and was additionally impressed as she asked for a bag of ice to be added to her order. The checker walked over to the ice cooler a few yards away, grabbed a bag of ice from the freezer and brought it back to the lady's shopping cart. What service! Even though I have an automatic ice maker at home that I was sure was working properly and didn't have any plans that involve filling a cooler with additional ice, I found myself wanting some ice too. When it was my turn, I requested a bag of ice and he purposefully walked over to the cooler and brought me back a bag. I praised his exceptional customer service and mentioned how I had used him as an example in a presentation I made at a conference last month. The topic was on positivity and this cashier's glass is definitely more than half full. There was a line forming behind me in the lane (as stores never seem to have enough registers open when they need them) that was certainly not a reflection of the speed with which he served customers. I looked back along the faces of the people in line and they were all smiling, something you don't usually see. What an amazing effect our attitude has.

When I finish teaching my yoga class and say that final Namaste, I can't help but smile. My yoga students give me positive energy and I hope that I give them some as well. I want them to seek me out and keep coming back to my class, just like I keep looking for that happy cashier at the store.

Think and Act Like a Kid Again

2010-06-15T01:02:00.004-05:00

I have a varied career and am a trifecta for the organizer when it comes to volunteering for Career Day at any school. I can cover three careers - trainer, engineer and fitness instructor. The high schools are more interested in having me discuss engineering, but I usually get to cover all three in my presentation when I work with the younger kids. I have games I play and activities to keep them interested and involved. One game I really like to use is a creativity exercise called the Paper Airplane game. The group is divided into teams and each team is given a different colored pack of paper to use. The object of the game is to be the team with the most paper airplanes in the landing zone when time is called (that is the only instruction given). The game only lasts for a few minutes and all teams start from behind the same starting line and have the same landing zone as a target. I have played the game with players of all ages from elementary school to adults. It is interesting to watch the differences in the age groups. The little kids make all kinds of airplanes including wadded up balls and paper is flying everywhere along with giggles and squeals. Once one teacher tried to correct the kids showing them how to correctly make an airplane and I had to stop her and tell them they were just fine. The older the kids were that played the game, the more restricted they were in their behavior. The adults would organize themselves, ask the best airplane maker to teach the others or set up assembly lines. It was an interesting experiment. One adult team would inevitably start to throw sheets of paper as the time started to run out, with someone finally throwing the rest of the pack to win the game.

We restrict our creativity as we grow up. We have to conform to all sorts of rules and our childlike spirit disappears. There were no rules in the game on what an airplane had to look like but we put restrictions on ourselves. The kids had no restrictions.

I held a yoga party on the beach last evening. A little boy that couldn't have been more than eight years old was watching us do yoga and came up to me and said he wanted to do it too. I told him he was very welcome to join us and he found a place for himself alongside the other yoga students. He did every pose that we did but with his own little eight year old twist to it. When he fell he didn't stop, he just tried again. He even tried the advanced poses where only your hands were in the sand and your feet were in the air. He stayed for the entire hour including resting quietly on his back in corpse pose for our savasana relaxation.

I smiled as I watched my regular yoga class this evening. No one stopped because they fell down or something was too hard. They just tried again and hung in there and made it to the end, like my eight year old yoga buddy.

We should all be more like eight year old kids in all we do - the world would be a better and more fun place to be.

To the Left, To the Right

2010-06-11T01:10:00.004-05:00

I was pulling out of a parking space and carefully looked to the left and the right as I started to inch out of the space. I always do it that way. My car is very low and it is hard to see around most vehicles parked on either side of me. It has served me well as I haven't hit anyone in a parking lot yet (knock on wood), unless you count high school. I drove my dad's car to school one day not long after receiving that most coveted privilege - the driver's license. It was a huge Chrysler and even though I am tall - 5"9" - I felt tiny in the front seat of that car. I pulled into a parking space, and the little perfectionist in me started to back up to pull in again perfectly parallel. It needed just a little straightening, I thought. When I backed up I tapped the VW bug (do they call them that anymore?) that was driving by. It just happened to be the high school driver education instructor. There wasn't any damage to either car but I was humiliated none the less - until I walked into the school. The driving instructor was not the most well liked teacher and I was a bit of a hero for a day as the story spread throughout the school. Maybe that is why I look so carefully from side to side now when I pull out of a space. I wish other people would. I always notice other drivers. It seems they are focused in only one direction. They have their eyes on a parking spot or a turn but forget to look the other way. Many times it is because they have their cell phone atached to one ear. But there's another story for another day.

In yoga class we always balance ourselves by repeating whatever pose we do for one side on the other. It makes sense in our heads and it makes sense for our body.

Check things out in both directions - whatever you are doing. You never know what you are missing that might be coming at you from the other side.

Just My Mat

2010-06-07T18:02:00.006-05:00

I am proud to say my oldest son just graduated from college with honors in a difficult major. He had several job offers and has a few months off before he has to join the real world. In the meantime, he is moving home to live with us while he makes the transition from one lifestyle to another. Everything that he owns came home with him (and was added to the remnants of high school - e.g. his varsity letter jacket and homecoming boutonnieres). This last week has been an unending sorting, dumping, moving process as I worked through his belongings with him as well as cleansing other parts of the house. I marveled at all the things we have acquired. There is nothing extravagant or particularly unusual in the mess, just a lot of clothes and toys and general stuff. What breaks my heart is when I come across something that is still in the package or shows no visible signs of wear. So many things and so little time to use them, I muse. I felt great as I loaded all the give-aways in the car and delivered them to the local donation center. There were many items I knew others would consider treasures that I hoped would be put to good use.

During the overhaul, as my son contemplated moving into his own apartment, he verbalized the things he would need. "I just need a bed, and some clothes and some food and a way to get to work - some kind of old car. That is all I really need." Yes - that is true. That is all we really need. (He had been talking for years about the new car he wanted to buy when he got out of school but today he spent hours cleaning up one of our old cars - seventeen years old to be exact - and is excited about using it.)

All I really need is my yoga mat. How simple life would be if all I had to carry with me was my mat. It is my refuge from the stresses of life. When I teach I escape into the yoga world with my students, breathing and stretching and working hard as we move from one pose to another, finally reaching savasana to relax at the end. All the stresses of the world are gone as we focus on yoga for that hour.

If I needed to I could use it as a bed. If I was cold I could wrap it around me and experience some relief from the cold or the rain - but maybe not from the Texas heat. If my house was burning down I would grab my yoga mat and run.

If they start making yoga mats out of chocolate I would definitely have all that I need to survive.

I Just Want Some Attention Please

2010-06-06T20:24:00.002-05:00

A transformer blew in the neighborhood and we lost power for several hours on a hot Sunday afternoon. We already had plans for a movie but decided to eat out after since we had no idea how long the power outage would last. We went to a steak restaurant where my favorite part of their awesomeness is their rolls. We were seated in the bar area and rarely saw our waiter even though we gave him signals - i.e. empty water glasses and bread baskets (not that I really needed him to refill that). I could have called for him but didn't want to embarrass the kids. The lack of attention was noticeable.

I walk around the room during yoga class adjusting people in their poses, with a gentle hand here or fingers coaxing them to move deeper into the pose in my direction. If they are looking down I gently touch their back to let them know I am there so they don't get surprised and fall over and then I ask them if they would like me to help them in a pose. Sometime I pose a question to the whole class asking if anyone would like me to help them get their foot behind their head or into some other contortion. Many times, all I have to do is walk by and I can see their leg go higher or they twist a little more and I don't even have to stop. It is amazing - the power of just walking by. I try not to spend too much time with one person because the rest of the class is waiting for the next move and they will let me know if I leave them in a pose too long. With a laugh I tell them they will have to keep the pose just as long on the other side so they are not lopsided and the lighthearted groans begin. If I spend too much time with one person the rest of the class does not get the benefit of my attention and assistance. It is a delicate dance.

I think the waiter could learn a little about paying attention to people from the yoga room (I don't want him to touch us! - just stop by a little more often!)

You Told Me To Do It

2010-06-05T01:37:00.004-05:00

The general public does not have the advantage I have in understanding some of the things that are going on behind the scenes with the Gulf Oil disaster. I have some direct conections within the "Company" and find the discrepancies between the breaking news headlines and comments from high officials, and the real story upsetting. But what disturbed me recently were comments from companies somewhat indirectly involved in the disaster. They claim that they will not have any legal obligations because they were told by the "Company" to do certain things against their better judgment (that is what they say - we really don't know that for a fact). My question is "What happened to their better judgment?" Why did they not stop something they didn't feel was right or they had knowledge of was wrong? Do they always just do what the "boss" says to do?

In yoga class I provide verbal instructions for poses as well as actually performing the pose for a visual reference. I also make recommendations for modifications. I let participants know that if they have injuries or a pose doesn't feel right or forces them to breath through their mouth instead of their nose (a sign they are struggling) they should back off or not do the pose at all. I trust them to know their bodies and know what is working and what is not working for them. I would not want them to keep pushing a pose or continue struggling if they knew it was not right for them just because I told them to do it. I believe these instructions and my participants' common sense (i.e. better judgment) keep them injury free.

Tell Me What I Am Doing Wrong So I Can Fix It

2010-06-03T22:23:00.005-05:00

I brush and floss my teeth daily and make visits to the dentist for a cleaning and check up every six months religiously. My teeth are important to me. Maybe the fact three of my five brothers are dentists has impacted my habits over the years, but there is nothing like that great feeling you get right after your teeth are cleaned. I don't want to eat because I don't want to mess them up. So, it was a surprise to me that with all this care I take I had a serious problem develop under a crown that required advanced dental care. I had to wait an entire month to get in to see the specialist. In the meantime I was encouraged by a fellow gym member to try their dentist - who could do everything in one visit. I decided it wouldn't hurt to check them out and see what they had to say.

I was a little apprehensive when I called for an appointment and was able to get in immediately. They tried to impress me with all of the fancy equipment and technology. They were still trying as I stood there with my purse in hand, my trademark sun visor on my head and my sunglasses perched on top ready to go. I never did tell them why I left. I wasn't sure the doctor really cared. I may still write to them in the hopes that it will make them think just a little bit more about the message they are sending out.

I usually have at least one new person in my yoga class every time I teach and several others that have only tried the class a few times along with the regulars and my hard core fans. Rarely, but it does happen, that a new person will roll up their mat and exit the room before class is complete. It breaks my heart that they might be frustrated or overwhelmed by the class. I always encourage the new people (actually everyone) to take breaks whenever their body tells them to and not to worry about what the other person's pose looks like - just make the pose work for them by modifying it however they want to. Normally, they hang in there and talk to me afterwards about their experience. But once in a while I can tell someone is overwhelmed and leaves. I wish I could run after them and talk to them and encourage them, but I have to stay with the rest of the class. I wish I could find out what I was doing that made it diffucult for them. Or maybe - they just wanted to try a little bit and will be back. But I don't know - because they never tell me.

I wish they would.

Make Me Do It

2010-06-03T22:08:00.002-05:00

When you walk in the door of your house at the end of a long hard work day, what you really need is some time to chill and make the transition from work to the family. A friend was telling his story about coming home from work, having solved problems all day and just wanting some time to relax and slow down before greeting his young son and hearing about the antics of the day. His wife, a stay at home mom, looks forward to the time when he gets home so she can enjoy adult conversation and usually starts to share her day the moment he comes through the door. I referenced the "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" book. The author describes how a man (and women do too!) needs a cave to escape to and a few minutes to transition before being ready to talk. He said his wife read the book but doesn't do it. I suggested she get a coach - someone to encourage her to practice the principles in the book.

I teach yoga and other fitness classes. My schedule makes me do the exercise. I have to be at a certain place at a certain time to teach, which guarantees I will exercise. I love it too so it is not hard to do, but that is beside the point.

What can you do to make sure you implement learning you have experienced through training or reading or keep up with an exercise program? I suggest you get a sidekick to encourage you and keep you motivated. It can be a friend or a professional coach. Try it, you will like it.

Other Leg On Top

2010-04-26T00:52:00.005-05:00

I was sitting in the hot tub (where I do my best thinking) visualizing an exercise I am planning to use as the opening to my workshop at a conference next month. In this partner exercise the participants stand and make physical changes to their appearance and then try to guess what others have done. It doesn't take them long to switch everything back after the exercise is over because they are comfortable with the way things were before.

In yoga class I try to start the class differently each time, changing the breathing exercise or whether we are sitting or relaxing in corpse pose. During class there are many familiar standby poses that we do every time but I also change the main focus of class. Sometimes it is headstands, splits, arm balances or twists to keep things interesting. Many students are able to more easily do a pose on one side but not as easily on the other. They might have more balance on their left foot so they don't like to balance on their right foot. They may have a tight right shoulder so they only like to do shoulder opening poses on the left side. In lotus pose (a seated position with the legs tightly crossed onto opposite thighs) some people are able to do the pose with one leg on top but not the other. They always do the pose with the leg that works on top, never trying to work through it with the other leg.

I encourage you to try the "other leg on top". Don't be so comfortable and always keep things the same or be so quick to change things back right after you try something new. You might just like the new pose or be surprised that something you couldn't do before is possible.

Sidekick

2010-04-21T16:40:00.005-05:00

We had just settled down to the start of yoga class and our relaxation breathing exercise. The back wall of the yoga room is clear glass and I noticed a couple walk up to the room and have a seat on a bench near the door with a good view of the room. Then they stood up to read the posted class schedule. I was sure they wanted to join us but assumed they felt a little uncomfortable because the class had already started. I went to the door, cracked it open, invited them in and handed them mats. They found a place near the back of the group and joined right in.

Just as I encourage others, I find myself encouraged by others to try new things.

My husband and I went to Cabo San Lucas recently for a birthday get-away. I have always wanted to zip-line and found myself on a bus with him and a group of tourists headed to San Jose for a zip-lining adventure. My husband really wanted to stay at the hotel and relax as he travels all the time - but after all - it was my birthday - so he went along for the adventure. "What is zip-lining?" you ask. You are harnessed and connected to a cable or rope that extends across a canyon and "slide" down the cable to the other side squealing all the way. At least I squealed. My first one was a squeal of fear, the subsequent ones were squeals of delight. Each zip gets longer and higher, which only adds to the excitement - or the fear depending on your perspective. At one point on the adventure you given a choice - to do the "chicken line" and head to the right for a few more zips or do the "adventurous" choice and head to the left for rappelling down a cliff and some rock climbing. As I contemplated the choices and considered whether I was a chicken, my husband headed down to the left without a word or his usual kiss good-bye. As I watched him disappear I thought - "I am not going to listen to him call me a chicken for the next few days" and my decision was made. I joined the rest of the adventurous travelers on the two by four foot platform at the top of the cliff. THIS WAS GOING TO BE FUN - I kept telling myself. And it really was.

It is difficult to take a risk and try something new. But, when you have a buddy with you or extra encouragement (e.g. desertion) it is always easier.

I recommend you find someone to be your SIDEKICK to stand or zip or downward dog at your side - (maybe even give you a little "side" kick) and you will find it easier to jump in and enjoy the adventure.

http://www.sidekickcoach.com/

Wine a Little - You'll Feel Better

2010-04-21T15:56:00.004-05:00

For the past few years I have attended the Yoga Journal Yoga Conference in San Francisco. It is a beautiful town filled with exciting things to do and the conference is always a delightful buffet of "All I Can Yoga" events and workshops. But my favorite part of the trip is hooking up with my sister to spend a day in the wine country. This last time we ended up at the Jacuzzi winery simply because the name reminded us of a lot of fun parties that ended up in a jacuzzi. It turns out the winery history connects back to the inventor of the Jacuzzi - (I knew I was going to like that place). I joined their wine club and received my first wine shipment today. As I opened the box and reviewed all the labels on the bottles I was reminded of that wonderful afternoon where my sister and I spent a few hours in wine heaven - sampling all sorts of white and red wines and the chocolates to go with them. A favorite was a chocolate shot glass that we were able to eat after shooting the wine. We were the only ones in the winery so we were given a great deal of attention - and extra samples - hence my joining the Jacuzzi wine club!

In yoga class, I encourage my students to gently use the wall, blocks and straps to assist them in getter deeper into a pose so that their body will remember where it is supposed to go in a pose. The next time they attempt that pose, their body might be able to take them to that place where the prop helped them get previously.

Like the wine shipment - the body and mind remember - and we enjoy the present moment or pose even more.

Where Were You Last Week?

2010-04-17T16:50:00.005-05:00

I sponsored my neighbor's son for his confirmation in the Catholic Church last night. I was there when the boy was born - which was an exciting tearful ceremony and I was there last night - which was a slightly tearful and exciting in a different way ceremony. His Eminence (I love that - his eminence) the Daniel Cardinal DiNardo said the mass and conducted the ceremony. I love to listen to him speak. He is clear and straightforward and funny. He said the mass for my sons and conducted their confirmation ceremony a few years ago when he was a bishop. The oldest said he would go to church every day if the Cardinal was saying the mass (I am sure I could find out where the Cardinal will be every day and get my son to live up to that one!) because he enjoyed his sermons so much. The Cardinal was presenting his sermon and was telling the story of Jesus appearing to the disciples after his death. "Jesus said Peace Be With You - he didn't say Where Were You Last Week?" I laughed as I thought of my yoga students.

Sometimes they are late for class and apologize. I smile and say - "It's not a problem - I'm glad you're here. It is always ok to come in no matter how late you are". Sometimes they tell me they are going to be gone or tell me why they missed the last ten classes and I am always glad they are back. No need to apologize. I won't grill you to find out where you were last week or why you won't be here next week. I'm just glad you are here now.

Only the Perfect Ones

2010-04-11T22:59:00.000-05:00

My husband was helping me fill hundreds of small bags with M&M's for a give-away in the attendee bags for a conference I am speaking at in May. I asked him to pull out any broken ones and only use the "perfect" ones as he filled the bags with a spoon. He obliged.

Then I connected it to yoga, as I always do.

I tell my students that their pose doesn't have to be perfect and that they don't have to look like the person next to them. I remind them that this is a practice and they should make the pose work for them however they have to modify it. I encourage them by saying every pose is a good pose as long as they are still breathing.

Then I looked back at the M&M 's I was pouring into a bag and let a broken one slip into the bag - with a smile.

Come On In and Join In On the Fun

2010-04-11T00:59:00.000-05:00

My husband was having a poker game with the guys at the house so I had to escape and entertain myself for six hours. That is not hard to do. I rallied the ladies together for drinks, a movie and a trip to a country western bar called Big Texas. One of my friends was worried we might be too old for the place. To alleviate her concerns I asked the bouncer at the door if there was an upper age limit for the bar. He didn't look like he had passed his twenty first birthday yet. He smiled and said, "that is the first time I've ever heard that one". I am sure he has heard a lot of interesting things. I replied, "that is the first time I ever asked that one". He assured me that we were not old at all and invited us into the bar. It turned out to be a grand time. There was a live band, many great dancers that are always fun to watch two-stepping around the dance floor, and great challenges at the pool tables. Oh, and did I mention the cute cowboys?

Some people have the same attitude toward yoga class. They think - I am too old, I am not flexible, I will never be able to do that. The list goes on. I think they are missing out on a good time and on something that is good for them. I say - Don't hesitate at the door, come on in and join in on the fun!

At What Price?

2010-04-05T01:07:00.000-05:00

The man on the lounge chair next to me at the pool in this beautiful Mexican town was talking about his company and the work they do. The Company sent several hundred employees to this resort for a sales celebration. They had an incredible stage set up on the beach for the evening events and we could hear the music, partying and awards presentation the night before. "Those salespeople that received awards probably log well over 80 hours a week working", he said with pride. He included himself in that prestigious group. "At what price?", I thought to myself as I learned of the separation in his marriage after inquiring about the book he was reading. It is his choice and I am sure he is happy with it for many reasons, but it would not be mine.

I think about the people in my yoga classes. Sometimes they don't listen to their bodies. Their bodies tell them to stop or back off from a pose and they keep pushing to get to that perfect performance of the pose no matter what hurts or how labored their breath is. "At what price?", I think. I encourage them to make every pose work for them but they have one thing on their mind and all else is lost from their focus.

Think about what you are doing. At what price? Do you need to change your focus?

Change Old Patterns

2010-03-21T21:04:00.002-05:00

When I first started taking horse back riding lessons it was fun because I didn't know anything and everything was new and fascinating and there was no pressure. I didn't know how to groom a horse or ride a horse or talk to a horse. Every lesson was exciting as I tackled a new technique. I still had to think quite a bit and that horse could cover a lot of distance while I was still thinking about how to get a certain result. My instructor had me try different horses and even bareback riding. That could get exciting because in order to stay on the horse I needed to squeeze my legs and that just made her go faster and I had to squeeze my legs harder not to fall off and - - - you got the picture!

But the one horse I rode most often, Libby, and I eventually ended up stuck in a little pattern. She would get away (I would let her get away) with stopping to eat grass and just stopping and not moving no matter what I did and how I tried to kick it up a notch. So I started to change the pattern. I took her across the road, I changed the pattern in the arena, and was finally able to get the results I wanted from her.

In yoga, I change up my classes a little bit every time and focus on different body parts. My students sometimes get into a rut and only work so far in a pose or stay with their favorite poses or the ones they can do and sit out on the ones they think are too hard for them. We need to change up the old patterns and try new poses or try to push a little harder to keep our body from falling into old patterns.

See you on the mat!

This Old One Works Just Fine

2010-02-23T13:49:00.002-06:00

I have been using my Ipod for the music in my yoga and cycle classes. It locked up the other day and I tried all the tricks on the Internet to get it to unlock along with asking for help from every Ipod expert I knew (anyone younger than me) but with no luck. As a last resort I took it into the Apple store for a repair. I was told it was outdated and there were no signs of life internally (I could have sworn I heard something whirring inside begging me not to kill it). It would be $199 to get it repaired but for $250 I could replace it with a new Ipod that had four times more capacity. What did I need four times more for when I haven't even used up half of what the old one was capable of and I think I have every song known to man loaded on it - or at least every song I know man wants to listen to? I left determined to give CPR to this old Ipod and get it to work. My husband found the trick - accidentally dropping it kicks it back in gear and it has been working ever since.

Sometimes what we have is just enough. We don't need anything more that what we are currently working with. The marketing and sales people are always trying to sell us something newer and better when what we have with a little patience sometimes works just fine.

So take a little more time with the yoga poses in your class and give yourself time to get to where you want to be with them. What you have works just fine - nothing is wrong with the latest model of you.

Relax and Enjoy the Ride

2010-01-24T00:47:00.000-06:00

The other day, I invited my yoga class to move to the wall so that we could work on some inversions. I explained what we were going to do and looked up to see a new member sitting on her mat near me looking just a little dazed. I asked her what was wrong. "I am feeling pretty inadequate" she said. It was her first class and she was trying to do every pose and was struggling with some but I thought she was doing great. We had a talk right there after I got the class started climbing the walls. I reminded her this was a benchmark class for her, that there were people at all levels in the class and she shouldn't compare herself to the gymnasts and the people that had been coming for years. She should relax and just do the best she could with every pose, rest when she got tired and watch when she wanted to. I told her that some things would come easy and some things would take a long time, but it was a practice, not a performance, and to stop putting pressure on herself. She relaxed, stayed for the rest of class and we ended up talking about yoga parties and how her wine business might merge with that idea very nicely. She was excited and looked forward to coming back.

I have reached the place with horse back riding lessons where my instructor is letting me take the horse out on my own. The other day was my second time doing this and I decided to work with the horse up and down the road instead of in the arena. I tried to just relax and enjoy the ride and be proud of myself for just being able to go out on my own. But, I have been trained to do so many things and have been able to get the horse to trot and canter and I wanted to be able to do that during that ride. It wasn't working out so well. I finally thought of the young woman in my yoga class that I had encouraged to just relax, do the best she could, and just enjoy being there practicing yoga with us. I knew I needed to listen to my own advice. I started to relax. I let go of trying to get the horse to move faster, slowed down my breath, let my hips move with her every step and paid attention to the beautiful horses grazing in the pastures around us. I finally relaxed and enjoyed the ride!

How's the Weather? - Don't You Wish You Were Here?

2010-01-08T13:09:00.001-06:00

My brother sent me a text from California yesterday bragging about the sunny warm weather. He then asked "How is it there?" knowing very well that we were going to get temperatures below freezing that night. I could almost hear his sinister laugh as he sent the text. I responded that this week it was cold but I should be back in my bathing suit in a week or two - like I was the week before.

I remember a business trip to San Diego in the middle of our Texas winter. I came out of a store that was up on a hill right at sunset. It was so incredibly beautiful I stopped in my tracks in the middle of the parking lot. For safety's sake I found a bench on the sidewalk and sat down to enjoy the incredible view. I was amazed at all of the other people around me continuing to walk in and out of the stores, and get in and out of their cars without stopping. How could they not pause and look at what I was looking at? Maybe they were just so used to it being perfect all the time that it didn't phase them anymore. How sad.

Getting outside today in the chilly 30 degree weather reminded me that I wouldn't really be able to appreciate the 60 degree weather we are likely to get in a week or two if I wasn't freezing today. We must have a few tough times to enjoy the good. It makes it so much sweeter.

The same applies to yoga. How much more incredible it is for the person who has not been able to touch their toes to actually do it one day. For the person who could never do the splits to actually get down all the way to the floor some day (that would be me!). I delight in these "YES!!!" moments for my students and for myself. But remember - the journey itself is also to be enjoyed. So - don't fret the freeze - enjoy this moment and the inevitable return of the sun.

Ever Elusive Quiet Time

2010-01-03T18:23:00.001-06:00

An instructor asked me to teach one of her fitness classes. It was at the same club I was heading to for my yoga class, but there was a 45 minute time gap between the end of her class and the start of mine. No class filled the time slot - just an empty room. I agreed to teach for her. I thought I would use the time to catch up on some telephone calls I had been meaning to make.

After the room emptied from the ab class I set up my yoga mat and sat down to make a few calls. I did manage to connect with one person but most of the calls I made ended up with me talking to peoples' voice messages. That was ok. At least they knew I was thinking about them as I left a cheery Hello. I still had a half hour before my yoga class started. I thought - wow - here is a full thirty minutes to just enjoy silence and meditate and I was trying to fill it up with calls and activity. I put the phone away and lay down on my mat in corpse pose to breathe and enjoy the quiet.

I had missed that place where everything stops except the breath. It was a wonderful thirty minutes and I intend to find more. As the new year takes off and so many of us are looking for more I will be looking for less. Less things to fill my time and more time to enjoy the silence. I look forward to the places my thoughts will take me and the ideas that never had a chance to grow because of all the activity around them.

Happy New Year.

I'm Waiting For You

2009-12-06T20:33:00.000-06:00

I attended a master class by a well known yoga instructor. I overheard how awesome he was at a conference in San Francisco and was delighted to find out he was coming to our town. The day of the master class I left the house extra early to make it to the west side of town in rush hour traffic in time for the "show". I arrived almost an hour before the scheduled start. The room was abuzz; yogis were talking excitedly and stretching on their mats with their noses on their knees and toes pointing to heaven. I enjoyed meeting the other yoga instructors and students at the session. The starting time came and went and the "famous" instructor was nowhere to be found. We received an update on their status - they had landed and were on their way in rush hour traffic. (They mentioned the instructor had another workshop that day and was coming directly from that - it appeared to be a case of poor scheduling). The instructor was laid back about his arrival when he finally did make it. After an hour and a half of lecture we finally started to move for the master class but I was already very disappointed.

I think some people just let it go because this was a famous person that they worshiped. But for me it was a small thing that told a lot about him.

Your audience looks forward to you. Many times they spend money, rearrange their schedules and make every effort to be there at the start for you. You should give them the same consideration.

I know. Sometimes unpredictable circumstances cause us to be late and that is understandable. I have given myself double the time to get to a speaking engagement only to find myself at a standstill in traffic because of an accident that closed the freeway and I should have given myself triple the time - who knew?! But those times are few and far between. Just not planning enough time to get there tells your audience they are not worth your time. What message are you sending?

Get Outside the Studio Thinking

2009-11-18T23:23:00.002-06:00

At a recent yoga gathering I mentioned my search for the perfect location for a yoga studio. I had investigated several locations. Some were too big (though I imagine someday I will need that much space!), some were too small without enough parking spaces for the members, but none were "just right" yet. A particularly positive yogi suggested expanding my search to include houses or other interesting buildings that could be fixed up and used as a studio. I immediately pictured "Yoga Barn" in the middle of a field with a man made lake (fake lake - as I call them) in the woods and this beautiful yoga barn!

I have yoga in the park, and yoga on the lake, and yoga at the beach - why not in the barn?!

As a student we are conditioned to stay on the mat. We hardly venture off the mat and try our poses on the floor or turn our mat to a different orientation besides facing the front. When I teach I walk about the room, dropping to a pose near whichever student I was helping last, sometimes on the floor, sometimes taking my mat with me as I move about the room! I am often off the mat hanging out on the grass striking a pose when I teach at the park.

We need to be open to different possibilities and I am grateful for the yogi who opened my eyes to a different place for a studio. I will try to keep my mind and my eyes open all the time!

Pomodoro Technique

2009-10-06T00:29:00.000-05:00

As I was preparing for a business class on Increasing Your Personal Effectiveness, I came across a technique called Pomodoro. We are bombarded with internal and external interruptions that prevent us from focusing on our work tasks. The internal interruptions include - our mind wandering from our work to constantly getting up to get a drink of water or other activities that prevents us from staying on task. External interruptions include phone calls and visitors. The Pomodoro technique involves setting a timer for 25 minutes of uninterrupted time. During that time you are to stay focused on one task. You do not allow yourself a break until the 25 minutes are up. Then you take a five minute break from your work - and return to it for another "Pomodoro" - 25 minute stint. The process is continued for four "Pomodoros", after which you are allowed a 30 minute break.

Just as we focus on the breath in yoga and I am sometimes distracted by movement and comings and goings in the room, I am distracted from my work. Sometimes, I feel like I am constantly working without the progress I would expect for the time invested. So, I decided to try the Pomodoro technique today. It was amazing how much I was able to accomplish when I focused on my projects for 25 minute intervals. I will share this technique with my business classes.

Oh, by the way, my Pomodoros included a 25 minute nap too! I consider that a very important task!

Try the technique and let me know what happens. More details are available on the Internet - just Google "Pomodoro technique"!

Heads Up Driving Week - Oct 5-11

2009-10-02T16:13:00.000-05:00

AAA is encouraging drivers to participate in Heads Up Driving Week by not texting or talking on the cell phone while driving. It is to encourage us to focus on our driving, not the person on the other end of the message or call, making our roads safer for everyone.

In yoga class we start with breathing exercises that help us with our focus as we breathe in and out in different rhythms, always focusing on the breath. I reminded my class of this focus tonight, and encouraged them to also take the Heads Up focus on driving challenge.

Heads Up this week!
I hope it lasts more than a week.
Why don't you try it and let me know how it works for you.

Don't Miss the Show

2009-09-27T20:51:00.000-05:00

When we arrived at the wedding reception, my yoga friend asked if I caught the sunset on the drive over the bridge. I had missed it and that surprises me. Sunsets, sunrises, the moon and the stars are my favorite "shows" and apparently I missed a good one. I vowed to myself not to miss tonight's show and it did not fail to impress me.

One of my friends always commented on the sunset if I happened to catch them on the phone on their way home from work. I like people who notice those events.

The weather is getting cooler - it is time to start yoga in the park at sunset. Maybe you will join us for one.

Let me know where you view the next sunrise, sunset or moon rise from.

Don't miss the next show.

Embrace Your Imperfections

2009-09-17T23:57:00.000-05:00

I had a wonderful experience this evening at a local community church. A few weeks ago a girlfriend invited me to this Ladies Night Out. I hesitated at first because I knew I would be tied up with teaching business classes for several days straight, including a business trip out of town, and I would be coming in late and tired the afternoon of the event. But, I said YES and am so glad I did.

The event theme was “Embrace Imperfection” – our imperfections.

It started with a light dinner (sandwiches and salads – yum!!) and the opportunity to meet new friends. Then we went in to the assembly area for -

awesome singing and music
a presentation by the ladies program director on all the magazines that promote and urge us to make or have the perfect meal, make-up, body, sex, …
testimonies from women about their obsessions for the perfect life, children and houses
an interpretation of the scripture with God's message to strive for perfection
then more awesome singing and upbeat music

It ended with us going back to our tables for cookies – yum!! (my girlfriend and I tracked down the chocolate cookies!) – and socializing - a few of my favorites things!

We were encouraged to accept our imperfections and embrace them and enjoy them for they are what make us unique.

I plan to remind my yoga people to embrace their imperfect yoga poses because they are what make the class and each of them so unique. The way they perform each pose is perfect for them.

At a recent yoga party I conducted, one of the ladies - having never done yoga before - approached each yoga pose with abandon - squealing with delight as she danced and expressed herself with open arms to each new twist of her body. It was a delight to watch. And though her poses did not mimic the perfect pictures in the yoga books, they were as perfect as they could be. If we all could only be so comfortable - and embrace our imperfections. Try it and let me know how it feels.

Stuff, Stuff and More Stuff

2009-09-11T17:49:00.000-05:00

I feel like a bag lady when I walk into the gym loaded up with all the items I need to teach my yoga class. There is the bag full of yoga mats for those members who don't own one, music, yoga blocks and straps, my zafu cushion, etc... If I teach two classes in a row, I may have another bag for that class - maybe filled with my cycling shoes, music, water, towels, etc... Over time the bags can get heavy as I toss in more music and things I might need. Occasionally I do a "spring" cleaning on a bag and dump the contents out on the floor. I am always amazed at what has accumulated. I sort through the items, end up throwing away a few things and feel much lighter and more organized as a result.

Spring cleaning isn't just for the spring. Try to get rid of some of your excess "stuff" this week. Just go through one drawer or bag or closet. Let me know how it works out.

I am Positive You Are Negative

2009-09-04T00:54:00.000-05:00

I had a toy clown growing up that was plastic and filled with air. It had sand in the bottom so that when you punched it, the clown popped back up to standing. I have often compared myself to that clown and many agree. No matter what is going on, I don't stay down for long. Usually, I am hopelessly optimistic.

But, when I took my latest horse back riding lesson I fell into the negative mode. The instructor had me trot the horse around the arena for several laps. She wanted me to focus on keeping the horse going. According to her, I did an excellent job. But, according to me there were so many things I wasn't doing right - my heels weren't down in the stirrups, I leaned forward sometimes, ... When I stopped I immediately started listing all of the things I could have done better and she asked me to stop. Sure, there were things I could improve on but I had done exactly as I was instructed and I really had things under control. So, why was I focusing on all the things I did wrong?

It is natural for us.

For this week, try to see all of the things that are going right and what you are doing right. Yes, we could improve on some things and we will keep those in mind. But try to be more focused on what is going right.

I always encourage my yoga students to do that. I need to remember to do it more for myself.

Let me know how you have focused more on the positive than the negative this week.

The Beach - It Isn't Hawaii but ...

2009-08-27T01:52:00.001-05:00

I love to escape to the beach by myself and set up my lounge chair on the sand near the seawall. I usually take some reading materials, my Spanish book and a notepad and pen with great intentions of "getting a lot done" while I am there. In reality, those books rarely make it out of my bag. When they do, they end up open with my face planted on them as I doze off lulled by the sound of the crashing waves. I actually do a lot of thinking, and come up with some workable ideas so it is not that important that the pen does not actually touch the paper. Then, I flip over occasionally, and feebly try to stay awake again. I alternate my little cat naps with walks on the beach or wave surfing. The ride home with the sun setting tops off a fabulous day. I come home so relaxed and appreciative of the opportunity to visit my office in Galveston!

Some people nix Galveston because it isn't anywhere near as pretty as Hawaii. Oh, I agree with that. But there are some days when that water is such a pretty deep blue, there isn't a cloud in the sky and the temperature is just perfect, that the fact it isn't Hawaii doesn't enter my mind. I feel sorry for those people who won't even try it. They are missing a beautiful day at the beach.

Some of my yoga poses aren't anywhere near as pretty as those on the front cover of the Yoga Journal either. But I still like to go into my poses and see where they take me that day.

So, stop being so hard on yourself and the world - enjoy.

A Million Stars

2009-08-27T01:34:00.000-05:00

I found a comfortable place on the top of the picnic table and relaxed on my back staring up into the night sky. What a view! So many stars were visible that it was impossible to count. What a contrast to the view I usually experience from my house in the suburbs. But tonight I was out in the country - way out in the country - and I was going to be present in the moment and enjoy every minute of it. I was teaching a business class for a power plant and was staying at a "rustic" lodge near the plant. I love the city but there is something about walking in the woods, hanging out just staring at the sky, not rushing to go anywhere or to do anything - that is SO GOOD for the soul. And I wanted to take in every minute of it before I sent myself off to bed to rest for work for the next day.

In yoga class I remind my students to be present in the class, to leave their troubles at the door and enjoy the hour they have given themselves to take care of just them. So many times we miss out on what is before us because we are thinking about what we should have done or what we should be doing or what we have to do when we finish what we are doing now...

Try to be more present in your moments. Enjoy where you are - even if it isn't exactly where you thought you would be or it didn't turn out exactly like you thought it would or how you wanted it to be. It is what it is and I encourage you to enjoy it anyway.

Then - tell me about it.

You Should Try It!

2009-08-25T21:04:00.001-05:00

A friend mentioned to me that a local yoga studio was offering free classes all week as they transitioned to a new format. I managed to work a class into my schedule on the only day I was going to be in town during the offer. It was a wonderful opportunity to sit back and enjoy a yoga class from the perspective of a student. I left the studio relaxed and rejuvenated.

I passed the word on to my students that evening, inviting them to try something new with the added benefit of it being free. There were a variety of formats for them to choose from - even classes for the athlete or advanced person willing to give it a go for two hours straight! I look forward to the reports on their experiences next week.

How many of them will actually take advantage of the opportunity for something new?
When is the last time you tried something new?

Look for opportunities to try something new every day. It doesn't have to be something huge! It can be a simple as a new food. When someone invites you to try something new, consider it seriously. You just might discover a new passion.

Don't Lock Me Out!

2009-08-22T21:40:00.001-05:00

I was setting up for my yoga class one evening and was over by the stereo on the far wall from the entrance to the room. I looked up and noticed someone at the entrance. I went back to my setup, expecting them to join us for class. Shortly after, I looked up again and noticed the person was still at the door trying to get into the room. I thought the door must have locked somehow and walked over to let them in. In the meantime, they gave up and stomped off down the hall. I tried to call after them but they disappeared around the corner. A few days later I received a call that a member had complained because I locked them out of the room.

I would never lock someone out of the room. At first, I didn't realize they couldn't get in. But - from their view through the other side of the door - it was a very different perspective.

We jump to conclusions very quickly and assume how we see things is the right version of the story. Then, we start acting as if that is really a fact. And it goes on from there. I am just as guilty of those assumptions as the next person. I've heard them referred to as Employee Olympics at the office - "jumping to conclusions"!

Check yourself the next time you start telling yourself a story about a situation. What other explanations could there be for what is or has happened? Give the other person the benefit of the doubt. Check your version of the story with them before you react. I think you will find that things are not always as they seem.

When have you jumped to conclusions? What are your stories? What have you learned from those events?

Bumblebees and Fish

2009-08-21T12:47:00.001-05:00

The Pike Syndrome is similar to the Bumblebee Theory in regard to imaginary obstacles we set up for ourselves. In my business classes I utilize the story of the northern pike that was placed in one half of an aquarium with minnows swimming freely and visibly in the other half of the tank - divided by a glass partition. The pike makes numerous unsuccessful attempts to get to the minnows, only succeeded in battering its nose against the glass divider. Slowly the pike “learns” that reaching the minnows is impossible, and seems to resign itself to its fate. When the glass partition is removed, the pike does not attack the minnows, even though they swim right under it's nose! This illustrates the pike syndrome, which is characterized by ignoring differences in situations, assuming complete knowledge, rigid commitment to the past and refusal to consider alternatives among others.

Think about something that you would really like to do but have avoided because of the many obstacles you believe are in your way. How many times have you told yourself that you don't have enough of something to get it done? Write down the obstacles that you think are in your way and determine if they are real or imaginary. You may realize the obstacles are only in your head - like the pike.

The Bumblebee Theory

2009-08-21T10:33:00.001-05:00

“Aerodynamically, the bumble bee shouldn’t be able to fly, but the bumble bee doesn’t know it so it goes on flying anyway.” - Mary Kay Ash

The story refuses to die. Insect flight aerodynamics are full of complexities and I (engineer though I am) have never attempted the calculations with angles of attack, vortex shedding and other terms that make some heads spin. I prefer to believe the story!

I occasionally retell the bumblebee story to my yoga students. I try not to tell them that "only advanced people can do this pose", or "you are a beginner so don't try this", etc... I tell them to pay attention to their bodies and the messages they are given. If something doesn't feel right they should back off. They should go slowly into the pose and pay attention to how it feels. But don't start with the mindset that you can't do something - be like the bumblebee.

I tell them - "someday - not - no way!"

What have you been avoiding because you told yourself you couldn't do it before you even tried?

Yoga on the Tee Box

2009-08-18T21:46:00.000-05:00

The golf course was beautiful (Magnolia Creek) but my golfing was not! Except - when I took a nice slow long yoga breath in and out before hitting the ball. It seemed to help my drives quite a bit.

Pranayama is loosely defined as life giving breath. We practice different breathing patterns (pranayama) at the start of our yoga sessions and focus on the breath as we work through poses.

Try this pattern - take a deep slow breath in for a count of eight, pause for a few seconds and then exhale out for a count of eight, always breathing in and out through the nose.

Now, think about a situation where you are sometimes a little stressed. Try the breath pattern above before that situation - a presentation or a golf swing or a difficult conversation or responding to an unfocused driver on the road or ...

Let me know how it works for you.

Let the Good Thoughts Roll - Off Your Tongue

2009-08-16T19:43:00.000-05:00

I was in line at the grocery store and noticed the woman behind me looking at me. I wondered what was wrong. Had I dropped something? Were my clothes ripped? Was my ice cream melting on the floor? Then to my surprise she said, "I'm sorry for staring but you have the most beautiful legs!" And that was the start of a most glorious day for me.

My favorite yoga instructor always started class with a story. One night she asked us to think about all the positive things we think about other people. Then she asked, "Why don't we let people know what we are thinking"? She encouraged us to tell people - even strangers on the street - those positive thoughts.

I usually do, but made a mental note to be even more aware of it knowing the effect it had on me.

I challenge you to "Let the good thoughts roll off your tongue"! Try it and let me know the results. I look forward to your stories.

My Life is a Party

2009-08-15T22:34:00.001-05:00

"My life is a party to be shared and experienced with everyone I know" - UNKNOWN

My 50th birthday was a year long celebration of events including a week long beach house party and a trip to Chicago with friends and relatives. While in Chicago, a perfect note (above) describing my life turned up on my hotel room pillow complete with my favorite food - chocolate. The goal of my blog is to share yoga related stories and happenings that provide tips for bringing more joy, love and zest to your personal and work life.

Let's party!!