The Perfect Party

I was invited to a personal shower for the future daughter-in-law of my friend. I love parties and really enjoy meeting new people. I behaved myself with the present I purchased which is so unlike me - a Victoria Secret gift certificate and Godiva chocolates. You really can't go wrong there.

I knew the moment my girlfriend and I pulled up in the drive-way it was going to be the "perfect" party. The pool in the backyard had the perfect fountain of water spraying over the perfectly clear water. The lawn was perfectly manicured. When we entered the house all of the women were perfectly behaved, standing or sitting, talking about perfectly appropriate party subjects. Two perfectly groomed poodles greeted us and later sat in the lap of the hostess - behaving as perfect poodles do. The table was beautifully set with little sandwiches and punch and a - you guessed it - perfectly decorated cake that matched the picture on the invitation. We were going to have dinner as a group after the shower so I tried to save my appetite but the cake kept calling to me. I can resist a store bought cake but I overheard that this one was baked by the hostess' work friend and she makes divine cakes. So I cut a small slice (that could fit into my mouth in one bite) and placed it on my napkin. I lifted the cake with my fingers and dropped it into my mouth and wow - what a delight and what a mistake. It was now going to be extremely difficult to resist getting more. I failed miserably at resisting. I ended up back at the table and sliced a much bigger piece of cake and again placed it on a napkin. My friend and the hostess happened to be standing next to me at the table this time. The hostess tried to put a plate under my napkin as I enjoyed the cake piece by piece. I let her put the plate under my cake but never did make it to the fork before I finished it off. It just tastes better to me when it can be enjoyed that way. The hostess kept a straight face but inside I am sure she was horrified. Maybe she never lived with five brothers or a houseful of men. I enjoy visiting the perfect party where everything is in its perfect place and sometimes wish mine was the same way - but I am much more comfortable when I can eat my cake my way!

I jest about the "perfectness" of the party. It really was a delightful afternoon and I immensely enjoyed the women I met. I sometimes have the perfect house too. Whenever we have a party all of the imperfections get fixed and cleaned and the house looks perfect when guests arrive. That is one of the reasons I love to have parties.

I consider my yoga class a party. Though we don't have cake and punch I like to make sure people have a good time. In my class there is no "perfect" - no perfect pose, no perfect anything - just practice. I like my members to smile, to laugh, to groan, to be creative with their poses and do their best with what they have. I try to emphasize the "relaxed - do what you can" atmosphere right away so everyone enjoys class and new people are not intimidated.

And sometimes - I even see some perfect poses.

Trash and Treasure

I was outside washing the car and heard a pick-up truck rounding the corner. I looked up to see a red truck making its way around the cul-de-sac with its bed overflowing with "stuff". I smiled because it was probably the usual (night before trash pick-up) recycling bandits. I think they are absolutely great. They drive through the neighborhood checking out people's trash to see if they can find any treasures. We helped one of them load our old washing machine onto his truck many moons ago. He knew a place that paid for scrap metal and that is where he took many of his trash treasures. Other items left on the curb are garage sale leftovers and would become very useful to that special someone willing to take the time to sand and repaint or repair a broken part. It's not for everybody but I am glad for those who do enjoy it.

The same can be said for yoga. There are some out there who will "trash" my treasure.
"Oh, that is too hard"
"I can't do that, I am not flexible enough"
"I don't get into all that chanting and incense stuff" (which we don't do in my classes - gym yoga is different than studio yoga)
If they only knew. If they just took a little time to investigate what it really is about, they would find a yoga that was perfect for them. There are so many types out there, I am sure there is one that will work for every body (I split that word on purpose!).

Like the recycling bandits, look around and check things out. You are sure to find a yoga instructor and class that is a treasure for you.

The Line Kept Getting Longer and Longer

I was looking for a checkout line and peered hopefully down the long line of unlit register lights to see only three or four scattered lights. I made my way to the closest one and was delighted to find that my favorite cashier was on duty. There is something about this checker. He is the best customer service person I have ever come across in my entire life (wow - that is something to say!). He is cheerful, friendly, easy going, helpful and can calm down the most unpleasant customer with a few words. I quickly made my way into his line. I watched him take care of the customer in front of me and was additionally impressed as she asked for a bag of ice to be added to her order. The checker walked over to the ice cooler a few yards away, grabbed a bag of ice from the freezer and brought it back to the lady's shopping cart. What service! Even though I have an automatic ice maker at home that I was sure was working properly and didn't have any plans that involve filling a cooler with additional ice, I found myself wanting some ice too. When it was my turn, I requested a bag of ice and he purposefully walked over to the cooler and brought me back a bag. I praised his exceptional customer service and mentioned how I had used him as an example in a presentation I made at a conference last month. The topic was on positivity and this cashier's glass is definitely more than half full. There was a line forming behind me in the lane (as stores never seem to have enough registers open when they need them) that was certainly not a reflection of the speed with which he served customers. I looked back along the faces of the people in line and they were all smiling, something you don't usually see. What an amazing effect our attitude has.

When I finish teaching my yoga class and say that final Namaste, I can't help but smile. My yoga students give me positive energy and I hope that I give them some as well. I want them to seek me out and keep coming back to my class, just like I keep looking for that happy cashier at the store.

Think and Act Like a Kid Again

I have a varied career and am a trifecta for the organizer when it comes to volunteering for Career Day at any school. I can cover three careers - trainer, engineer and fitness instructor. The high schools are more interested in having me discuss engineering, but I usually get to cover all three in my presentation when I work with the younger kids. I have games I play and activities to keep them interested and involved. One game I really like to use is a creativity exercise called the Paper Airplane game. The group is divided into teams and each team is given a different colored pack of paper to use. The object of the game is to be the team with the most paper airplanes in the landing zone when time is called (that is the only instruction given). The game only lasts for a few minutes and all teams start from behind the same starting line and have the same landing zone as a target. I have played the game with players of all ages from elementary school to adults. It is interesting to watch the differences in the age groups. The little kids make all kinds of airplanes including wadded up balls and paper is flying everywhere along with giggles and squeals. Once one teacher tried to correct the kids showing them how to correctly make an airplane and I had to stop her and tell them they were just fine. The older the kids were that played the game, the more restricted they were in their behavior. The adults would organize themselves, ask the best airplane maker to teach the others or set up assembly lines. It was an interesting experiment. One adult team would inevitably start to throw sheets of paper as the time started to run out, with someone finally throwing the rest of the pack to win the game.

We restrict our creativity as we grow up. We have to conform to all sorts of rules and our childlike spirit disappears. There were no rules in the game on what an airplane had to look like but we put restrictions on ourselves. The kids had no restrictions.

I held a yoga party on the beach last evening. A little boy that couldn't have been more than eight years old was watching us do yoga and came up to me and said he wanted to do it too. I told him he was very welcome to join us and he found a place for himself alongside the other yoga students. He did every pose that we did but with his own little eight year old twist to it. When he fell he didn't stop, he just tried again. He even tried the advanced poses where only your hands were in the sand and your feet were in the air. He stayed for the entire hour including resting quietly on his back in corpse pose for our savasana relaxation.

I smiled as I watched my regular yoga class this evening. No one stopped because they fell down or something was too hard. They just tried again and hung in there and made it to the end, like my eight year old yoga buddy.

We should all be more like eight year old kids in all we do - the world would be a better and more fun place to be.

To the Left, To the Right

I was pulling out of a parking space and carefully looked to the left and the right as I started to inch out of the space. I always do it that way. My car is very low and it is hard to see around most vehicles parked on either side of me. It has served me well as I haven't hit anyone in a parking lot yet (knock on wood), unless you count high school. I drove my dad's car to school one day not long after receiving that most coveted privilege - the driver's license. It was a huge Chrysler and even though I am tall - 5"9" - I felt tiny in the front seat of that car. I pulled into a parking space, and the little perfectionist in me started to back up to pull in again perfectly parallel. It needed just a little straightening, I thought. When I backed up I tapped the VW bug (do they call them that anymore?) that was driving by. It just happened to be the high school driver education instructor. There wasn't any damage to either car but I was humiliated none the less - until I walked into the school. The driving instructor was not the most well liked teacher and I was a bit of a hero for a day as the story spread throughout the school. Maybe that is why I look so carefully from side to side now when I pull out of a space. I wish other people would. I always notice other drivers. It seems they are focused in only one direction. They have their eyes on a parking spot or a turn but forget to look the other way. Many times it is because they have their cell phone atached to one ear. But there's another story for another day.

In yoga class we always balance ourselves by repeating whatever pose we do for one side on the other. It makes sense in our heads and it makes sense for our body.

Check things out in both directions - whatever you are doing. You never know what you are missing that might be coming at you from the other side.

Just My Mat

I am proud to say my oldest son just graduated from college with honors in a difficult major. He had several job offers and has a few months off before he has to join the real world. In the meantime, he is moving home to live with us while he makes the transition from one lifestyle to another. Everything that he owns came home with him (and was added to the remnants of high school - e.g. his varsity letter jacket and homecoming boutonnieres). This last week has been an unending sorting, dumping, moving process as I worked through his belongings with him as well as cleansing other parts of the house. I marveled at all the things we have acquired. There is nothing extravagant or particularly unusual in the mess, just a lot of clothes and toys and general stuff. What breaks my heart is when I come across something that is still in the package or shows no visible signs of wear. So many things and so little time to use them, I muse. I felt great as I loaded all the give-aways in the car and delivered them to the local donation center. There were many items I knew others would consider treasures that I hoped would be put to good use.

During the overhaul, as my son contemplated moving into his own apartment, he verbalized the things he would need. "I just need a bed, and some clothes and some food and a way to get to work - some kind of old car. That is all I really need." Yes - that is true. That is all we really need. (He had been talking for years about the new car he wanted to buy when he got out of school but today he spent hours cleaning up one of our old cars - seventeen years old to be exact - and is excited about using it.)

All I really need is my yoga mat. How simple life would be if all I had to carry with me was my mat. It is my refuge from the stresses of life. When I teach I escape into the yoga world with my students, breathing and stretching and working hard as we move from one pose to another, finally reaching savasana to relax at the end. All the stresses of the world are gone as we focus on yoga for that hour.

If I needed to I could use it as a bed. If I was cold I could wrap it around me and experience some relief from the cold or the rain - but maybe not from the Texas heat. If my house was burning down I would grab my yoga mat and run.

If they start making yoga mats out of chocolate I would definitely have all that I need to survive.

I Just Want Some Attention Please

A transformer blew in the neighborhood and we lost power for several hours on a hot Sunday afternoon. We already had plans for a movie but decided to eat out after since we had no idea how long the power outage would last. We went to a steak restaurant where my favorite part of their awesomeness is their rolls. We were seated in the bar area and rarely saw our waiter even though we gave him signals - i.e. empty water glasses and bread baskets (not that I really needed him to refill that). I could have called for him but didn't want to embarrass the kids. The lack of attention was noticeable.

I walk around the room during yoga class adjusting people in their poses, with a gentle hand here or fingers coaxing them to move deeper into the pose in my direction. If they are looking down I gently touch their back to let them know I am there so they don't get surprised and fall over and then I ask them if they would like me to help them in a pose. Sometime I pose a question to the whole class asking if anyone would like me to help them get their foot behind their head or into some other contortion. Many times, all I have to do is walk by and I can see their leg go higher or they twist a little more and I don't even have to stop. It is amazing - the power of just walking by. I try not to spend too much time with one person because the rest of the class is waiting for the next move and they will let me know if I leave them in a pose too long. With a laugh I tell them they will have to keep the pose just as long on the other side so they are not lopsided and the lighthearted groans begin. If I spend too much time with one person the rest of the class does not get the benefit of my attention and assistance. It is a delicate dance.

I think the waiter could learn a little about paying attention to people from the yoga room (I don't want him to touch us! - just stop by a little more often!)